


Guessing Games

by phoelynfabulous



Category: Kirby (Video Games)
Genre: Art, Attempt at Humor, Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, Fluff, Humor, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Takes place BEFORE star allies, Villain Reformation, Villains to Heroes, chatfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:35:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 23,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26272720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phoelynfabulous/pseuds/phoelynfabulous
Summary: Susie's created a chat app for all her friends. All of them. When Kirby manages to break his groupchat, Susie has to find a new place for him and his friends. Even if they're not fond of their new "roommates".Takes place BEFORE Star Allies. ;)
Relationships: Magolor/Mark | Marx
Comments: 130
Kudos: 289





	1. Crash Landing (Pilot)

**Author's Note:**

> Never thought I'd write a chatfic. But! Here's a chatfic With A Twist!
> 
> The majority of this fic has already been written - as of me posting this, it has 11318 words and counting. Most of that is just plotpoints however, I'm still writing little conversations here and there - hence the "and counting".

_2:23 PM_

**Susie has added Kirby, Meta Knight, King Dedede, Bandan Dee, and 8 others to the chat “The Secret Hideout”.**

**Communism:** HEY HEY HEY WHAT

**Capitalism:** Excuse me what?!

**Rorrim:** Susie, there are rules about adding new members, that _you_ created!

**Stabby McStabface:** WHY.

**Susie:** This is temporary one moment please!!

**King Dedede:** SUSIE

**King Dedede:** WHAT IS THIS

**Capitalism:** This is _supposed_ to be a villains-only chat!

**King Dedede:** THEN WHY WAS I NOT INVITED?!

**Meta Knight:** Why is there a chat SPECIFICALLY for villains?

**Meta Knight:** WHY HAVE YOU GIVEN THEM THIS RESOURCE, SUSIE.

**Susie:** Everyone be quiet I'm trying to fix the problem!

**Bandan Dee:** Okay but why are you named Stabby mcstabface??

**Stabby McStabface:** I did not choose this.

**Stabby McStabface:** Why don't you ask Communism.

**Communism:** excuse me im hilarious

**Communism:** why did susie add you people anyway?????

**King Dedede:** Our old chat crashed, so we're crashin here for now

**Communism:** 5/10

**Meta Knight:** We need to be in constant communication in case of disaster, so we need a chat at all times. This crash is a blow to our security.

**Meta Knight:** Disasters like the ones you would all cause, I imagine.

**Kirby:** who are you guys by the way?

**Communism:** nope

**Capitalism:** Absolutely not.

**Rorrim:** Under no circumstances.

**Stabby McStabface:** Nay.

**Kirby:** okay :(

**Daroach has changed their name to “Da Rat That Makes All'a Da Rules”**

**Capitalism:** Pardon my language, but I think the fucknot!

**Capitalism has changed Da Rat That Makes All'a Da Rules name to “Daroach”**

**Capitalism:** Don't get too comfortable here, this is temporary, remember?

**Capitalism:** You won't be making ANY rules.

**Daroach:** Rats.

**Communism:** 2/10

**Rorrim:** Hopefully you'll be out of our hair soon. I can't put up with any more of this, and it's been five minutes.

**Susie:** So

**Susie:** It turns out I won't be able to fix the problem or create a new server for about three weeks due to this error.

**Susie:** So you'll all have to play nice with each other for now.

**Rorrim:** GOD FUCKING DAMNIT

**Communism:** oh ill play, but it sure wont be nice

**Capitalism:** Seriously?!

**Capitalism:** It was hard enough to moderate for these guys alone!

**Kirby:** don't worry cap! we'll be extra nice in your chat, okay?

**Communism:** dcsasfasfdasd KIRBY STOP ITS TOO SWEET ILL GET A TOOTHACHE IF YOU KEEP THIS UP

**Kirby:** :3

**Capitalism:** “Cap”, d'aw. I like it.

**Capitalism:** Aaaaand Com just screamed so loud I think I might be deaf!

**Kirby:** oh no are they okay???

**King Dedede:** Ya'll are roommates?

**Capitalism:** He's fine, it was a scream of delight, I think

**Capitalism:** Just me and Communism live together.

**Capitalism:** I don't think Ror or Stabby should ever see each other face to face actually

**Capitalism:** They might try to kill each other.

**Kirby:** why???

**Stabby McStabface:** Honor.

**Meta Knight:** A fellow knight?

**Stabby McStabface:** Silence.

**Bandan Dee:** Do you guys even know who each other are??? your calling each other by your nicknames

**Capitalism:** First, you're*, second, we're doing this to keep our identities a secret from YOU.

**King Dedede:** If you're all villains, aka you've attacked Kirby, don't we already know who you are??

**Capitalism:** Technically yes, but if we told you then you'd just hate us.

**Kirby:** i wouldnt :D

**Rorrim:** That is because you are a fool.

**Capitalism:** That's because you're too innocent for your own good

**Communism:** thats cuz your super gullible

**Bandan Dee:** WOAH WOAH PLAY NICE REMEMBER

**Rorrim:** Just stating a fact.

**Susie has silenced Rorrim for 5 minutes!**

**Susie:** Be kind to Kirby. New rule.

**Communism:** THIS IS THE VILLAIN CHAT WHY WOULD WE BE KIND TO KIRBY

**Susie:** Remember when you _weren't_ kind to Kirby?

**Communism:** good point

**Communism:** be kind to kirby or fuckin perish

**Communism:** got it

**Meta Knight:** Language.

**King Dedede:** He has a filter on his phone for foul language, it's fine

**Meta Knight:**...Did you put that there?

**King Dedede:** No, he downloaded it himself cuz he didn't want to read swears but didn't want to control what his friends could or could not say

**Capitalism:** Oh my stars??

**Communism:** SO. MANY. CAVITIES.

\-------

_3:46 PM_

**Taranza:** so what is this?? a chat for villains????

**Taranza:** why does this exist??? why is susie friends with these people enough to give them phones and accounts?

**Susie:** I met **@Capitalism** during my time in Another Dimension, and he was the key to my escape. I offered him a phone and a few extras to give to his friends to communicate.

**Susie:** Ror and Stabby I found while trying to find a replacement for a project of mine.

**Capitalism:** Communism was a bit of a stowaway with me for a while. Stopped at a... location of interest, took him aboard and then he sort of never left.

**Capitalism:** Well, he did leave briefly, but we found each other again.

**Communism:** i wouldntve left if you didnt kick me out!!

**Capitalism:** You were manipulating and lying to me the entire time we lived together!

**Communism:** pot kettle yada yada

**Taranza:** and after that you went.. back to living together????

**Communism:** we're the only people who can put up with each other :)

**Capitalism:** I just can't get him to leave again.

**Taranza:** okay, one more question: who are you people

**Stabby McStabface:** When will you all realize that we aren't going to answer that question?

**Capitalism:** Look, here's the deal **@everyone**

**Capitalism:** We aren't going to give you our identities, there are a lot of reasons to keep ourselves secret: If we tell you who we are and you decide it's not safe for us to be out and about, you'd hunt us down. Which I imagine none of us are interested in. On top of that, the events we all went through, on the side of both "hero" _and_ "villain", were _extremely_ unpleasant, and if you know who we are it might result in more unpleasant, more personal insults that none of us can deal with right now.

**Taranza:** that makes sense, sorry for asking

**Daroach:** I can respect that

**Meta Knight:** That seems fair.

**Kirby:** aww, okay. i don't want anyone to be upset! keep your secrets if you need to <3

**Capitalism:**...But if you want, we can make this interesting.

**King Dedede:** Oh?

**Capitalism:** I can't speak for the others, but...

**Capitalism:** If you can guess who I am, I promise to assist you in anything you might need, and be your ally for as long as you ask.

**Bandan Dee:** ooooooooo! that sounds fun!!

**Communism:** ill take that bet! count me in too!!

**Rorrim:** I will participate. I do not think you will succeed.

**Stabby McStabface:** I am interested.

**King Dedede:** OH HELL YEAH TIME FOR GUESSING GAMES

**Kirby:** that sounds like so much fun!!!! i cant wait to make friends with you guys!!

**Capitalism:** Bold of you to assume you'll actually be able to guess any of us correctly.

**Kirby:** im sure it won't be that hard!

**Kirby:** i already know a lot about you guys anyway!!

**Communism:** pff, like what

**Kirby:** rorrim and stabby are prone to fighting and stabby is probably a knight, cap can travel through dimensions and owns some kind of spaceship that you can live on and you have teeth! youd be surprised at how many people i know dont have teeth

**Rorrim:** …

**Capitalism:** Oh.

**Susie has changed Kirby's name to “Sherlock”**

**Susie:** Let the games begin.


	2. Philosophy and Selfies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 of the Dream Friends in The Secret Hideout chat, and things are already getting out of hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just realized I totally forgot to add who everyone was, like who was in the groupchat before and also who the villains are.
> 
> BUT!
> 
> If you DO NOT want to play along and guess who everyone is (which by the way, is... not really difficult, sorry if you wanted a challenge) then you can look at the character tags, where I've actually tagged everyone who makes any kind of appearance in this fic, including of course, those who are keeping their names secret.
> 
> If you want to know who everyone ELSE is, but NOT the villains, worry not; everybody speaks at least once in this chapter, plus... one other thing ;)
> 
> Happy reading, and happy guessing!

_8:45 AM_

**Communism:** so if were the villains can we have cool villain names

**Capitalism:** Good morning. Sure, if you want one, but I don't.

**Communism has changed their name to “Galactic Ambitions”**

**Galactic Ambitions: @Villains** if yall wont change your names to cool ones then i will

**Capitalism:** 1, We're*, 2, Y'all*, 3, is that a threat?

**Galactic Ambitions has changed Capitalism's name to “Starlord”**

**Starlord:** Apparently it was.

**Rorrim:** No.

**Galactic Ambitions:** fool.

**Galactic Ambitions has changed Rorrim's name to “ow, the edge”**

**ow, the edge has changed their name to “Shadow Soldier”**

**Galactic Ambitions:** now were getting somewhere!

**Galactic Ambitions:** i see nothing wrong with Stabby McStabface

**Stabby McStabface:** I hate this name, but I fear whatever else you might come up with.

**Galactic Ambitions has changed Susie's name to “Cabinet Man”**

**Cabinet Man:** Ahem.

**Galactic Ambitions:** oh right sorry

**Galactic Ambitions has changed Cabinet Man's name to “Cabinet Woman”**

**Cabinet Woman has changed their name to “Susie”**

**Susie:** Unfortunately for you, my name is not on the line and I refuse to be associated with Neil Cicierega.

**Galactic Ambitions:** coward

**Sherlock:** good morning!! :D

**Galactic Ambitions:** greetings detective

**Starlord:** Hi there, Kirby!

**Starlord:** I don't suppose you've figured anyone out yet, have you?

**Sherlock:** not yet, but i have a hunch! ;)

**Shadow Soldier:** That's extremely concerning.

**Sherlock:** i started making a list of everyone ive ever fought, even the little ones who dont threaten the world, and ruling out the impossible ones! so far so good! :)

**Stabby McStabface:** … You're certainly taking this seriously, hm?

**Stabby McStabface:** I suppose it makes sense that as Dreamland's hero you would want to remove every threat possible, regardless of whether or not they're currently hostile.

**Sherlock:** i mean, i guess

**Sherlock:** i'm mostly interested in the part where you become my friends if i figure you out

**Sherlock:** i feel like a lot of villains happen just because they dont get enough love, y'know? if i get the opportunity to show some love to someone, even someone who's already a villain, i feel the same way i do when i save Popstar.

**Sherlock:** because sometimes a little kindness can save someone. <3

**Galactic Ambitions:** i'm crying

**Starlord:** That's so thoughtful...

**Shadow Soldier:** It's naive. The world is harsh and unforgiving. An act of kindness could just as easily soften someone who needs to toughen up to survive, and others can and do use kindness to mislead and manipulate others.

**Galactic Ambitions:** woah there dude

**Starlord:** You're wrong.

**Starlord:** Every act of kindness is an act of strength and courage, where anger and hatred is weakness. It's easy to react with rage in any situation, but to remain calm and polite and helpful is a continuous motion, difficult and taxing.

**Starlord:** In the end, EVERYONE needs to soften a bit. Peace is difficult to maintain, but so very worth it in the end.

**Shadow Soldier:** You said yourself how your loss to Kirby forced you to become stronger to survive! You're a liar and a hypocrite, likely trying to get on the puffball's good side again.

**Starlord:** The trauma of me and Kirby's battle isn't what makes me strong. It's my will to continue on afterwards. It's my choice to let it be and not seek vengeance!

**Starlord:** The trauma made me angry, cold and bitter, alone and in pain. _I chose to be kind._ That takes courage.

**Sherlock:** …

**Sherlock:** Star is right... Dark Meta Knight.

**Galactic Ambitions:** WHAT

**Starlord:** oh shit whst

**Stabby McStabface:** Oh dear

**Shadow Soldier:** _...how._

**Sherlock:** you were the one i had a hunch on.

**Sherlock:** my first guess that it was you was based on your nicknames: i remembered how you and stabby might fight each other and how stabby might be a knight and thought you might be too! when you changed your name to shadow soldier it added to that; you're a soldier.

**Sherlock:** on top of that, you're not just any soldier, you're a _shadow_ soldier. like you associated yourself with darkness. but then I remembered your first name! “rorrim” is just mirror backwards, like your looking at it in a mirror!

**Sherlock:** and a shadow and a reflection are super similar, they're something that's created by something else, and a perfect copy of that thing too

**Sherlock:** plus there was the name that gala gave you, and the speech you just gave. the name implies that you talk about dark stuff like that often...

**Sherlock:** and it makes sense that you'd think that way. the mirror world is tougher and scarier than Dreamland! there's probably a lot of reasons to be angrier and meaner there... but Star is right that, instead of getting meaner, everyone should be getting nicer! then there'd be less fights!

**Sherlock:** that's kinda hard to change for a whole world though. it'll take time.

**Starlord:**...Wow. _Bravo._ That's seriously living up to your nickname.

**Shadow Soldier:** … as per the terms of the agreement, I must assist you in whatever you might require of me.

**Shadow Soldier:** However, I cannot fulfill this agreement, as I cannot leave the Mirror World. The Mirror is broken.

**Sherlock:** i know something you can do!! can you send me a picture of you?? i need it to add to my list of friends!

**Shadow Soldier:** No.

**Starlord:** AS PER THE TERMS OF THE AGREEMENT.

**Shadow Soldier:** Fine.

**Shadow Soldier:**

**Sherlock: @everyone**

**Galactic Ambitions:** :O

**Meta Knight:** _WHAT_

**Shadow Soldier:** WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

**King Dedede:** EXCUSE ME WHAT

**Taranza:** oh no not you

**Starlord:** KIRBY THAT WAS COLD

**Daroach:** Woah who's this guy, Meta Knight clone?

**Sherlock:** yeah kinda!

**Adeleine:** sorry for not talking earlier but who is this??

**Shadow Soldier:** Ah right, Taranza, I'd forgotten about you. For the record, it was... not my doing.

**Taranza:** i wasn't quite sure whether to suspect you or not in the first place, but thank you for the clarity.

**Sherlock:** AN APOLOGY! you're already being super nice!!!

**Shadow Soldier:** NO

**Bandan Dee:** hang on do you not have a reflection??

**Bandan Dee:** it would make sense, but...

**Shadow Soldier:** There's no actual mirror in the frame, because it's broken on the other side. But, to answer your question:

**Shadow Soldier:**

****

**Galactic Ambitions:** stars i wish i could be that subtly creepy

**Starlord:** You are, actually.

**Starlord:** I'll elaborate in person so I don't describe you physically in this chat

**Starlord:** At this rate, Kirby will guess us all by the end of the week.

**Sherlock:** can everyone i guess also send a picture of themselves for my friend list?

**Starlord:** Sure. Might as well do it to prove we are who you say we are.

**Galactic Ambitions:** im also adding a new rule

**Galactic Ambitions:** if you get found out you get a stupid nickname

**Shadow Soldier:** Don't

**Galactic Ambitions has changed Shadow Soldier's name to “ow, the edge”**

**ow, the edge:** DAMNIT NOT AGAIN

**Adeleine:** if it makes you feel better we can post pictures of ourselves too.

**Sherlock:** hey yeah that makes sense! most of these guys probably haven't met most of us!

**Sherlock: @everyone** if you're not a villain, post a picture of yourself!

**Adeleine:**

****

**Daroach:**

****

**Susie:**

****

**Kine:** Guess it's time to break the silence, huh?

**Rick:**

****

**Coo:** I would've liked to stay quiet the whole time. I don't need to deal with villainy shenanigans!

**Gooey:**

****

**Starlord:** oh stars

**Daroach:** That startled me

**Ribbon:**

****

**Taranza:**

****

**Starlord:** All of you are so cute!

**Galactic Ambitions:** they're from Popstar

**Galactic Ambitions:** everythings cute on Popstar

**Starlord:** How humble of you. /s

**Galactic Ambitions:** if you call me cute i will prove you wrong SO fast

**Sherlock:** YOU'RE FROM POPSTAR?!

**Galactic Ambitions:** OH SHIT

**Galactic Ambitions:** STARLORD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

**Sherlock:** THAT MAKES THINGS A LOT EASIER AND A LOT HARDER

**ow, the edge:** SUFFER, GALA.

**Starlord:** Why would it be hars vtramhujhukn [ ;

**Meta Knight:** Are you alright?

**Starlord:** He just tried to take my phone.

**Starlord:** I'm being attacked as we speak.

**Meta Knight:** You seem oddly calm for someone under attack

**Starlord:** I'll give you this; I have a shield.

**Starlord:** I probably deserve to leak that kind of information after that bombshell.

**Starlord:** As I was trying to say, why would it make that any harder? It narrows down the list, doesn't it?

**Sherlock:** every villain from popstar is either my friend already to the point where they're in the chat, or dead.

**Starlord:**...Can we see the list?

**Sherlock:** sure: here's all the villains who came from popstar: king dedede, meta knight, daroach, taranza, sectonia, marx, nightmare, and i think dark nebula?? i think they might be a part of dark matter but they were in a chest on popstar so y'know

**Starlord: ...** You've befriended a surprising amount of enemies.

**Adeleine:** so, marx, sectonia, nightmare and dark nebula are all dead then?

**Sherlock:** yeah

**Sherlock:** i don't really like killing people but i do like making friends, so i save villains whenever i get the chance!

**Adeleine:** so what happened to those four?

**Sherlock:** not gonna explain sectonia

**Taranza:** thank you

**Sherlock:** nightmare was the guy who broke the fountain of dreams and caused a bunch of nightmares in dreamland.

**King Dedede:** I don't know why, but that's funny to me

**Sherlock:** what, nightmares?

**King Dedede:** No, just the way you phrased it

**Sherlock:** right. well, that fight got really intense, since it broke the moon and all, so there wasnt much i could do about it

**Sherlock:** dark nebula's dark matter like, and most dark matters don't wanna be friends

**Sherlock:** except for gooey. Gooey's a friend.

**Gooey:** :D

**Sherlock:** marx, on the other hand...

**Sherlock:** i would've loved to be friends with him, really! he was a pretty funny and otherwise nice guy, but he was a lil... unstable

**Sherlock:** to make a long story short **,** he crashed into this big machine in space and it exploded because of it... so he must've hit it really, really hard... he never came back. i didnt want to go look cuz iwas worryd about what id find tere

**King Dedede:** Kirby?

**Sherlock:** imean id wanted to find marx but i didnt want to find pieces of marx everywhere so

**King Dedede:** Do you need a hug?

**Sherlock:** yes please

**Meta Knight:** On my way

**Starlord:** Aw geez... sorry for bringing this up, Kirby.

**Adeleine:** yeah, im sorry too! I'm coming to bring you hugs!! And cookies!!!

**Starlord:** I hereby dedicate one of Adeleine's hugs to you as my own, regardless of whether you'd want a hug from the enemy.

**Adeleine:** :)

**Ribbon:** im coming too!

**King Dedede:** Bringing Bandan to the hug party with me!

**Sherlock:** thank you guys <3

\-------

_10: 03 AM_

**Sherlock:** oh hey, i just realized what's missing

**Sherlock:**

****

**Sherlock:** there! now there's a picture of everyone we know :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent an entire hour trying to figure out how to add the drawings! :D
> 
> (no fault of the staff, just my own stubborness and the fact I was doing it at 11 PM)
> 
> Also should probably mention that the chapters won't normally be released this quickly, I just happened to have this chapter done already and nothing chronologically comes before it, so here it is


	3. Certified Gamer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A game or two is played.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a short one this week (gonna try to post these weekly), but it needs to be here to introduce a Concept(tm)

_2:23 PM_

**Daroach:** Gonna play some Minecraft

**Daroach:** Certified gamer

**Stabby McStabface:** “Not having a group chat is a breach of security”, he says.

**Stabby McStabface:** Clearly, this is of utmost importance.

**Daroach:** Please consider shutting up

**Starlord:** Minecraft is fun. I spend too much time on it.

**Daroach:** Starlord, Terror of Dreamland, Player of Minecraft.

**Starlord:** I imagine most people prone to power-tripping enjoy games where you can play God.

**Daroach:** Oh that does make sense actually

**Bandan Dee:** Ado and I are on the server if you wanna hop on

**Daroach:** Yeah sure

**Bandan Dee:** VC?

\-------

_The Secret Hideout: Voice Channel #1_

_2:26 PM_

_Ba-bum!_

“need to like – hi! - need to uh, get a flower farm or something for that.”

“Can you even make a flower farm?”

Bandan Dee seemed to think for a moment. “Maybe? I thought you could bonemeal the double-tall ones and it gives you another one or something like that...”

“You could use dispensers full of bonemeal on grass, and use pistons to pop em' off,” offered Daroach, “what d'ya need flowers for? I think I have some I can give you.”

“Banners,” Adeleine said simply. “I need the dyes.”

“If you make a dye farm you'd basically have a monopoly for anyone who needs concrete or glass, too.”

Bandan Dee said a quiet “oh, yeah, right” as Adeleine said “Guess I'll be struggling through redstone today.”

Daroach opened his mouth to speak-

_Ba-bum!_

“Hello,” he said idly to whomever joined the chat, “if you need any help with that just lemme know Ado.”

Whoever joined the chat wasn't speaking for some reason.

“Thanks, I might need it,” said Adeleine as Daroach pulled up the chat to check who'd joined.

_**Adeleine** _

_**Bandan Dee** _

_**Daroach** _

_**Starlord (muted)** _

“I see you there, Starlord. Gonna speak up?”

“Wait, Starlord's in the chat?” Bandan Dee pulled up the chat too.

_Ba-ding!_

**Starlord:** My voice is kinda recognizable. You don't mind if I listen in, right?

Daroach shrugged, then realized nobody could see him. “Yeah, sure, go ahead.” he clarified as he shared his screen.

“You can stay, but I want pictures of your Minecraft world in exchange!” offered Ado.

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:**...why?

“Because I'm curious to see what you've made? I dunno.”

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:** Sure, let me boot up the game. Might take me a moment.

_Ba-ding!_ **Sherlock:** who are you talking to??

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:** The people in the voice chat. I'm muted.

And of course, there was the _ba-bum!_ of Kirby joining the chat.

“Haiii~!”

“Hi Kirby!”

“Hello Kirby!”

“Aw, hey Kirbs.”

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:** oh my gosh I missed hearing your voice you adorable world-destroyer you

Kirby giggled happily.

“How you doin', Kirby? Having a good day?” Daroach was smiling already.

“Uh-huh!” Kirby sounded like they were nodding enthusiastically as they said it. “Oh, uh, um, E!” he added and then he began typing, the loud clacking of his keyboard signaling that he had something to say.

_Ba-ding!_ **Sherlock: @Bandan Dee** are we still on for the picnic today?

“Oh right! Yup! Now that I think about it, I should probably start packing my snacks. I'll hop back on the server later, alright guys?”

“Sounds good. You two enjoy your picnic, alright?”

“Will do! See ya'll later!” Bandan Dee said. His words were punctuated by the _ba-dum_ of someone disconnecting.

“Buhbai,” Kirby mumbled cheerily as he also disconnected.

“I love that kid.”

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:** Here's your toll, Adeleine. 

“Oh _my gosh-!_ ”

“Oh _wow,_ that's definitely more than a few weeks of your life dedicated to minecraft, holy shit.”

“It's like a painting, how did you even do this?!”

_Starlord is typing..._

…

“...hello?” said an unfamiliar voice.

Daroach's eyebrows went up. He looked at the chat and, sure enough, Starlord had unmuted himself.

He did _not_ sound the way he'd imagined, like, at all. From the dramatic way he typed and his history as a villain, he'd expected his voice to be much lower. He sounded rather pleasant and polite, with a completely unknown accent that made his words sound like they'd been cut short.

“Hi?!” said Adeleine, completely caught off guard, “I thought you were hiding your voice?”

“I haven't met any of you, so I don't think you'll recognize me.” Starlord explained. “And to answer your question; sand. So much sand.”

“I wasn't talking about the glass! How'd you take away all the water?”

“Like I said, sand. It's easier to remove after you've placed it since it falls. I just made sand walls, used sponges to get rid of the water on the inside, then cleared out the sand and did it again.”

Daroach whistled, “So yeah, that definitely took you a while.”

“About a month.”

“Is there like, a reason for this?”

“Well I mean, I made it because it looks _sweet,_ but there's a mini guardian farm on the inside, too.”

_Ba-bum!_

“Hey, ya'll!” King Dedede greeted the group.

“Howdy.”

“Hi, King Dedede! Did you see Star's monument thingy?!”

“Yep, looks pretty neat. S'that what you guys have been talkin' about?”

_Ba-ding!_ **Starlord:** Yep. I named this place Patientia **@Adeleine**

Daroach tilted his head. Another quick check of the chat revealed that he'd muted himself again.

Odd. Thinking back on it, he realized that Starlord had muted himself for Bandan Dee, before Kirby had joined the chat.

...Would Dedede, Bandan Dee and Kirby all be able to recognize him if they heard him speak?

\-------

_3:48 PM_

**Sherlock:** hey **@Starlord**!

**Starlord:** Hello?

**Sherlock:** what other games do you like to play?

**Starlord:** Heh

**Starlord:** Nice try, Kirby, but if you want to know more about me you'll have to be sneakier than that.

**Sherlock:** aw come on! what harm could knowing your favorite game do??

**Sherlock:** please??

**Galactic Ambitions:** yeah c'mon starlord, seriously?

**Galactic Ambitions:** what if hes trying to get you a gift or something and needs to know what games you like first? could be totally innocent here

**Starlord:** Cease.

**Sherlock:** what games do you like gala?

**Galactic Ambitions:** unlike starlord i am not afraid to answer a question

**Starlord:** I know you're doing this on purpose, fiend.

**Galactic Ambitions:** i... am not very good at video games tho

**Galactic Ambitions:** so i dont really have a favorite

**Sherlock:** aw, im sure you're not that bad!! keep at it and you'll improve!

**Galactic Ambitions:** thats not

**Galactic Ambitions:** …

**Galactic Ambitions:** y'know what? youre right.

**Galactic Ambitions:** im gonna go play a video game and nothing short of divine intervention will stop me

**Sherlock:** YEAH!!

**Starlord:** Oh, this will be fun to watch.

**Sherlock:** PLEASE TELL ME HOW ELSE YOU HAVE FUN

**Starlord:** NO!

**Sherlock:** :,(

**Starlord:**...don't do this to me.

**Sherlock:** ;_;

**Starlord:** FINE. You'd better not look into this too much.

**Sherlock:** :D

**Starlord:** I already said earlier I like games where you can play god. It's therapeutic.

**Starlord:** The Sims comes to mind, but I also like when it's challenging, like in Minecraft you have to work to become unstoppable, and then when you get to that point you can shape the world around you.

**Starlord:** Unless you play in creative mode. Straight up being able to build things immediately is also fun but I spend less time on it.

**Starlord:** It's probably because I like building things in real life too, but I enjoy the physical effort it takes. Makes it more satisfying when it's complete.

**Sherlock:** you build things? like what?

**Starlord:** You won't be getting any more out of me, detective.

**Galactic Ambitions:** one time he tried to get into speedrunning and when he was done he was so excited he just dashed around the ship for an hour

**Starlord:** HOW DARE YOU

**Starlord:** TRICK ME INTO THINKING YOU'RE HARD AT WORK

**Starlord:** ONLY TO TARNISH MY IMAGE.

**Galactic Ambitions:** just went NYOOM

**Starlord:** STOP

**Galactic Ambitions:** zoomies

**Starlord:** I HAVE A REPUTATION, YOU TRAITOR

**Galactic Ambitions:**...this is the easiest joke you've ever handed me.

**Starlord:** Don't. You. Dare.

**Sherlock:**???

**Sherlock:** hello?

**Sherlock:** where'd you both go??

**Starlord:** I have returned.

**Sherlock:** what happened??

**Starlord:** Oh, nothing important.

**Sherlock:** is gala still alive???????

**Starlord:** Well, I didn't check to see if he was breathing, but he's recovered from worse.

**Sherlock:** what was the joke?

**Starlord:** Goodnight!

**Sherlock:** it's only 4??

**Starlord:** GOODNIGHT.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In today's chapter: How has nobody thought about prose in the form of voice chat for chatfics, another one of many roommate battles, and enough foreshadowing to give you a concussion with how hard you're being hit over the head with it.
> 
> In the next chapter: Oh Dear, A Loophole(tm), spellcheck, and bastardly actions on all sides.


	4. Say Hey Hey Hey If You're Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Those with poor sleep schedules have a conversation in the dark of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my third favorite chapter.

_1:32 AM_

**Galactic Ambitions:** ayo insomniac check

**Galactic Ambitions:** say hey if youre awake

**Stabby McStabface:** Sleep is for the weak.

**Coo:** Oh, so I'm not the only night owl here!

**Galactic Ambitions:** 3/10, good idea poor presentation

**Starlord:** Gala it is ONE IN THE FUCKING A.M., go to sleep

**Galactic Ambitions:** as if ive ever slept

**Galactic Ambitions:** besides, you hypocrite, youre also awake

**Starlord:** Lords above, I wish I wasn't.

**Starlord:** I've been doing trajectory calculations for the past 5 huors

**Bandan Dee:** *hours

**Starlord:** I hope you fall.

**Bandan Dee:** this is so vague what does it MEAN

**Starlord:**...I am so tured

**Starlord:** *tired

**Starlord:** That insult makes sense in my native language I promise

**Galactic Ambitions:** youreup pretty late, huh, bandan? you got a date with a noddy or something??

**Bandan Dee:** no, it's just my turn on the night watch

**Stabby McStabby:** What, pray tell, is a “Noddy”?

**Coo:** Sleepy little guys. They sleep for more than half their entire lives, but they're nocturnal also.

**Galactic Ambitions:** most of em anyway

**Starlord:** Must be nice.

**Bandan Dee:** they're also super cute

**Bandan Dee:** with those big ol eyes

**Galactic Ambitions:** again, everything on popstar is super cute

**Starlord:** So therefore, by extension...

**Galactic Ambitions:** I AM NOT ON POPSTAR, AND THEREFORE NOT CUTE

**Starlord:** hang on

**Galactic Ambitions:** what

**Starlord:** Just trying to think of a cutsier version of your name

**Starlord has changed Galactic Ambitions's name to “Milkyway Wishes”**

**Starlord:** Like that, for example

**Coo:** He's got nothin to say?

**Starlord:** He's too busy to type at the moment.

**Milkyway Wishes:** put down the shield i just wanna talk

**Starlord:** You're a fool and a liar.

**Milkyway Wishes:** and your a wizard and a liar whats your point

**Bandan Dee:** really?

**Milkyway Wishes:** of course

**Starlord:** Of course not.

**Bandan Dee:** adding wizard to the list....

**Starlord:** OKAY, WISH WILL BE GOING TO BED NOW.

**Milkyway Wishes:** i already told you i dont slee kjnesnr bthinhj

**Starlord:** _You will when I'm done with you, bitch._

**Susie has silenced Starlord for 5 hours!**

**Susie has silenced Stabby McStabface for 5 hours!**

**Susie has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 5 hours!**

**Susie has silenced Coo for 5 hours!**

**Susie has silenced Bandan Dee for 5 hours!**

**Susie:** Go the fuck to sleep.

\-------

_3:12 AM_

**Daroach:** Is anyone else awake?

**Daroach:** And capable of speech?

**Taranza: s** targazing over here.

**Susie:** Still working.

**Susie:** It looks like Wishes wasn't kidding about insomnia, as he is still online.

_Milkyway Wishes reacted with “❤️”_

**Susie:** Oh dear, a loophole.

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “😉”_

**Daroach:** Is Starlord asleep, Wish?

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “👍”_

**Daroach has changed their name to “Da Rat That Makes Da Rules”**

**Da Rat That Makes Da Rules:** Finally, I cannot be stopped.

**Susie:** I'm still here, you know.

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Da Rat That Makes Da Rules's name to “Think Again, Bitch!”**

**Think Again, Bitch!:** WHAT, COME ON

**Susie:** I forgot you had nickname privileges

**Think Again, Bitch!:** WHY IS HE ALLOWED TO DO ANTHING

**Susie:** He's a sort of a half moderator, in that he can do everything Starlord can except ping everyone and silence people.

**Think Again, Bitch!:** Gee, I wonder how he lost those privileges.

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Think Again, Bitch!'s name to “i might not be able to silence you but there are other ways i can torment you”**

**Taranza:** uh oh

**Milkyway Wishes has changed i might not be able to silence you but there are other ways i can torment you's name to “Rat Bastard”**

**Rat Bastard:** You little shit

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “😈”_

**Taranza:** dont insult him you dont know how far he'll go!

**Susie:** Ugh. Everyone go to bed, _please._

**Taranza:** yes ma'am

**Rat Bastard:** Fine.

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “👍”_

\-------

_6:46 AM_

**Milkyway Wishes:** I AM FREE

**Susie:** Not that you could even be contained.

\-------

_9:25 AM_

**Bandan Dee: @Starlord** so the “i hope you fall” thing has been haunting me non stop since you said it

**Bandan Dee:** what does it mean

**Milkyway Wishes:** hes still asleep

**Sherlock:** just went up and read all that, how long did he stay up for??

**Milkyway Wishes:** only like 2:30

**Meta Knight:** “Only”

**Milkyway Wishes:** 2:30 is only the beginning of the night when you dont sleep ever

**Starlord:** It's a common insult in my native language, it jus doesn't translate well.

**Bandan Dee:** just*

**Starlord:** Shut up, I'm still tired.

**Milkyway Wishes:** then go back to bed you sleep deprived idiot

**Starlord:** I woke up at 9, I must maintain this lucky streak.

**Meta Knight:** Luck?

**Sherlock:** is 9 lucky?

**Starlord:** It's not lucky everywhere??

**Meta Knight:** Seven is generally considered a lucky number, but not nine from what I've heard.

**Starlord:** Where I'm from the number nine is associated with life and second chances

**Starlord:** I didn't realize this wasn't universal

**Sherlock:** you have a really neat culture!! i'd love to know more about it!!

**Starlord:** And I'd love to tell you more, except I don't want to risk my identity, so I can't.

**Meta Knight:** You know, you could always just tell us who you are. If you want to be friends with Kirby, then forfeiting would make things easier on everyone involved.

**Starlord:**...A tempting offer, but I think I'll keep playing as intended.

**Starlord:** Besides, I'm sure Kirby's having fun with this, and I wouldn't want to throw away his efforts to keep track of every detail about myself I let slip.

**Sherlock:** the game's still on for starlord, woo!

**Starlord:** MWishes made me breakfast!

**Starlord:** Well I mean, he made breakfast for himself and I stole some, despite that being an incredibly dangerous task

**Starlord:** but y'know

**Bandan Dee:** Mwishes?

**Rat Bastard: “** tips hat” m'wishes

**Starlord:** Shut uuuppppp

**King Dedede:** M'wishes

**Meta Knight:** M'wishes

**Milkyway Wishes:** GET HIS ASS

**Bandan Dee:** M and W arent even close what

**Starlord:** It was a stupid mistake, just ignore it

**Rat Bastard:** Did you almost call him “milky”?!

**Milkyway Wishes:** please do NOT call me that

**Starlord:** NO

**Starlord:** Again, dumb sleep deprived brain, that's all

**King Dedede:** M'ilky

**Milkyway Wishes:** if i could silence you....

**Starlord has silenced King Dedede for 1 minute!**

**Starlord:** Just for M'wishes.

**Milkyway Wishes:** bold words for someone in stabbing range

**Starlord:** If you find a way to stab me I would be extremely impressed. So please, by all means, try!

**Milkyway Wishes:** i dont need arms to stab you

**Milkyway Wishes:** i have a fork and im not afraid to use it

**Bandan Dee:** why'd you phrase it that way

**Milkyway Wishes:** in what way

**Bandan Dee:** you mean like... “i could stab you with my arms tied behind my back”??

**Milkyway Wishes:** yes

**Rat Bastard:** This just in: Wishes has no arms.

**Milkyway Wishes:** SHUT UP

\-------

_10:12 AM_

**Sherlock:** hmm.

**Starlord:** What is that supposed to mean

**Starlord:** Did you find someone out

**Starlord:** I'm scared whenever you breathe

**Sherlock:** be afraid >:)

**Sherlock:** jk, everythings fine

**Sherlock:** just a hunch

**Starlord:** Your last hunch found someone out on the second day, I have reasons to fear.

**Sherlock:** :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...The next chapter is my second favorite chapter.


	5. Baby Pictures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Childhood's a wild thing.

_12:32 PM_

**Bandan Dee:** I just found a video of me as a baby!!! so cute!!

**King Dedede:** I DEMAND TO SEE THIS VIDEO AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

**Bandan Dee:** Yes Great King!!!

**Susie:** When I was little I dismantled a doorframe after watching a show about a handyman intended for toddlers.

**Bandan Dee:** wh

**Meta Knight:** How?

**Susie:** I mean, I thought I was pretty clear.

**Susie:** I just got into my father's toolbox one day and, using my education from the show, proceeded to dismantle the door.

**Susie:** “This is a flathead screwdriver! Oh hey, those are flathead screws!” * unscrews the flatheads *

**Rat Bastard:** Valid.

**Rat Bastard:** I mean, I used to steal shit all the time as a kid and now I do it professionally

**Susie:** Because of course you did.

**Milkyway Wishes:** when i was little i tried to walk across a clothesline and fell and hit my head

**Milkyway Wishes:** i still have a scar

**Susie:** Now _that_ requires some elaboration.

**Milkyway Wishes:** it does?

**Susie:** Yes.

**Susie:** Why.

**Milkyway Wishes:** because my siblings had a stupid game where they'd try to keep their balance for as long as possible on something unsteady, and id practice while they were asleep

**Milkyway Wishes:** on the plus side i have amazing balance

**Milkyway Wishes:** on the downside it meant that sometimes, you wake up your mom screaming because you fell off a clothesline and hit your head

**Milkyway Wishes:** i made it more than halfway across and we didn't even need to go to a hospital so i think this was a win for me

**Susie:** And this is why I ask you to explain things.

**Susie:** Because _somehow_ it always becomes more absurd with extra detail.

**Starlord:** I was a very talkative kit, I'd give really long speeches to my stuffed animals and told all kinds of crazy stories that only a child could come up with

**Starlord:** The only issue was that I couldn't pronounce my L's and R's until I was 11 due to a speech impediment. It was incomprehensible.

**Rat Bastard:** And now you're a villain of Popstar

**Rat Bastard:** Could you imagine if it never went away and you tried to take over/destroy the planet while not pronouncing your R's and L's

**Starlord:** Oh dear

**Sherlock:** cutest monologue ever!

**Taranza:** HA, “I, Tawanza, will fowevew sewve my bewoved Queen!”

**Susie:** “Ovewwiting iwwewevant ewwow, pwease wait.”

**Sherlock:** “weww, i wish to contwol popstaw!”

**Meta Knight:** …

**Meta Knight:** “Bwavo, Kiwby”

**Starlord:** Okay thatsd enoughh

**Milkyway Wishes:** starlords dying over here

**Meta Knight:** “You've twuwy eawned youw weputation as a hewo.”

**King Dedede:** “Youw hewp defeating Wandia was invawubwe.”

**Sherlock:** WANDIA

**Starlord:** please stop I cant breathh

**King Dedede:** “Ah, at wong wast, it's mine! The souwce of wimitwess powew... The Mastew Cwown!”

**Starlord:** PLEASE

**Starlord:** MERCY

**Bandan Dee:** “Obtaining dis cwown has been my pwan da whowe time!”

**Starlord:** *ultimate goal all along

**Bandan Dee:** EVEN BETTER

**Bandan Dee:** “My uwtimate goaw aww awong!” thats even more ws

**Bandan Dee:** anyways, i brought the video

**King Dedede:** AW YES

\-------

_4:12 PM_

**King Dedede:** Hey wait

**Sherlock:**????

**King Dedede:** HEY WAIT

**Meta Knight:** What is it?

**King Dedede:** STARLORD????

**Starlord:** How many people have even monologued to Kirby like this is a significant amount of quotes you have here

**King Dedede:** DONT CHANGE THE SUBJECT

**Starlord:** I... didn't?

**King Dedede:** THERE WERE ONLY FIVE PEOPLE THERE HOW DO YOU KNOW???? WHAT WAS SAID

**Starlord:** um what

**King Dedede:** ME, META KNIGHT, KIRBY, BANDAN, And

**King Dedede:** … :)

**Starlord:** no

**Meta Knight:** Oh I see what you're talking about now...

**Sherlock:** i didn't notice what is it???

**Bandan Dee:** oh wait YEAH

**King Dedede:** … “*ultimate goal all along”, huh?

**King Dedede:** Funny how you knew what Bandan said was wrong, huh, _Starlord?_

**King Dedede:** Or should I say...

**Sherlock:** :o Magolor!

**Starlord:** NO

**Sherlock:** i knew it was you!!

**Starlord:** NO

**Starlord:** YOU'RE WRONG.

**Sherlock:** …

**Sherlock:** :)

**Starlord:** uh oh

**Sherlock:** what's with the weird wooks?

**Starlord:** _NO._

**Sherlock:** Awwow me to expwain evewything!

**Starlord:** FUCK OFF

**Sherlock:** you have a spaceship, live in another dimension, say “bravo”, dmk said you wanted to get on my good side _again,_ bandan said you were a wizard and a liar, and you know the speech by heart!!!

**Starlord:** _DAMNIT_

**King Dedede:** OR SHOULD I SAY

**King Dedede:** _MAGOWOR_

**Starlord:** NO, YOU MAY _NOT_ SAY

**Susie has changed Starlord's name to “Magowor”**

**Magowor:** DON'T ENCOURAGE THEM

**Susie:** And another one bites the dust! ;)

**Sherlock:** it's nice to see you again!!

**Magowor:** Wow, it is?

**Sherlock:** of course, we're friends!!! :)

**Magowor:** A horrible decision, really, to be my friend.

**Sherlock:** but I figured out your name, so we're friends now, remember?

**Magowor:** Oh yeah I forgot about the stakes...

**Magowor:**...eh. I guess there are worse fates than being your friend, Kirby.

**Sherlock:** :D!!

**Meta Knight:** Is that supposed to be a compliment?

**Magowor:** Only if you want it to be.

**Meta Knight:** Fair enough.

**King Dedede:** So will you be returning to Dreamland anytime soon then?

**Magowor:** I dunno why I laughed at that. Not right now though, I still have a passenger on board.

**Milkyway Wishes:** he isnt going anywhere if you cant figure out who i am ;)

**Sherlock:** then i guess i have a new mission!

**Milkyway Wishes:** i shouldnt have egged him on

**Magowor:** DON'T THINK I DIDN'T NOTICE THAT

**Sherlock:**??

**Milkyway Wishes:** egg

**Magowor:** NO

**Milkyway Wishes:** I HAVE BEEN HOLDING BACK MY EGG PUNS TO KEEP YOUR SECRET SAFE

**Milkyway Wishes:** ITS ABOUT TIME THAT YOU CRACKED

**Magowor:** Pardon, I have to go beat up my roommate.

**Milkyway Wishes:** what, you egg?

**Milkyway Wishes:** wait that prompts him to stab me NO

**Milkyway Wishes: as** dsfd trfdftrdrsed lp[;rtrm7iilp[;

**Rat Bastard:** I can't believe Wish's fucking dead.

**Sherlock:** how am i supposed to guess who he is now??

**Magowor:** Eh, he's alive.

**Magowor:** I'm sure he wishes he wasn't, though.

**Milkyway Wishes:** 7.6/10

**ow, the edge:** Aren't you forgetting something?

**Magowor:** Hm?

**Sherlock:** oh yeah!!

**Sherlock:** we need a picture from you!

**Magowor:** Oh right, the toll!

**Milkyway Wishes:** i see nothing wrong with Magowor for a stupid nickname

**Magowor:** I shall wear it with equal parts shame and pride.

**Sherlock:** picture??

**Magowor:** One moment, finding a good angle.

**Magowor:**

\-------

_6:32 PM_

**Bandan Dee:** OH WAIT

**Bandan Dee:** OF COURSE “I HOPE YOU FALL” IS AN INSULT

**Bandan Dee:** YOU'RE FLOATY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2/4. :)
> 
> This is one of the first chapters I came up with, and it remains one of my favorites to quote.


	6. A Linguistics Lesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chat learns a little Halcandran.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So from... aaabout this point on, if you read something you think you may have read before, it's because I've been sharing my headcanons around in places other than this fic, so some things may seem a lil familiar. That being said, I don't think I've shared any of these publicly yet so enjoy some worldbuilding while it's still fresh!

_5:09 PM_

**Susie:** Hey **@Magowor** , I don't suppose I could convince you to stop by halcandra and pick something up for me?

**Magowor:**...No.

**Magowor:** I can send you safe coords, or pick you up and drop you off in orbit, but I can't land. I don't think Landia would believe me if I told em I was just visiting this time.

**Susie:** I can't travel cross-dimensionally, so you'll have to pick me up.

**Magowor:** You have a way to get down safely?

**Susie:** The Business Suit's fit for space travel, that should be fine.

**Magowor:**...do you think the chat can send and receive messages cross-dimensionally?

**Rat Bastard:** What the hell are you two talking about

**Rat Bastard:** What's halcandra??

**Sherlock:** thats magolor's home planet! He has a super neat culture and a cool language too! i wanna learn it someday <3

**Magowor:** Aw! I'd love to teach you some Halcandran, Kirby!

**ow, the edge:** “cool language”.

**ow, the edge is quoting 6 messages from “The Secret Hideout”**

> **Rorrim:** Of course.I've dedicated my life to the Lady of Justice.
> 
> **Capitalism:** Okay sink.
> 
> **Communism:** wh
> 
> **Capitalism:** nevermind
> 
> **Rorrim:** What?
> 
> **Capitalism:** NEVERMIND.

**ow, the edge is quoting 3 messages from “The Secret Hideout”**

> **Capitalism:** GUESS WHAT?! THIS MORIDIOT JUST TRIED TO MICROWAVE A METAL CAN AGAIN. GOD, WHY.
> 
> **Stabby McStabface:** Moridiot.
> 
> **Rorrim:** Pick an insult, Magolor.

**ow, the edge is quoting 1 message from “The Secret Hideout”**

> **Capitalism:** Well, isn't this just a fucktangular mess we've gotten ourselves into!

**ow, the edge is quoting 1 message from “The Secret Hideout”**

> **Starlord:** I hope you fall.

**Magowor:** You would call me out like this...

**Magowor:** In front of my ONLY admirer, no less...

**Sherlock:** what does this have to do with language?

**Magowor:** … you said you wanted to learn more about it, right?

**Sherlock:** uh huh!

**Magowor:** Okay, rant time.

**Magowor:** Right, so there used to be _many_ different Halcandran languages. Depending on whether you were technology based or magic based and with the added factor of where you lived determined what language you probably spoke.

**Magowor:** Being multilingual was an uncommon talent, highly sought after for diplomatic reasons.

**Magowor:** Soon, it was discovered that if you spoke multiple languages to a newborn child, they would learn new languages faster, and grow up multilingual instead of needing to learn over years and years of study.

**Magowor:** When war became more common, it became the norm to teach your child to speak as many languages as possible, those who grew up to be soldiers made for excellent spies due to their ability to eavesdrop.

**Magowor:** The side effect of this was that the multilingual children would switch languages mid sentence, still perfectly grammatically correct, if they forgot words or just needed to convey something differently.

**Magowor:** The multilinguals would teach all the languages they knew to their children, and a few extras as well. They would share the same habit. It passed on from generation to generation...

**Magowor:** So, now that the Halcandrans are scattered across space and dimensions, we all actually speak the same language.

**Magowor:** AND THAT LANGUAGE HAS NO RULES. NONE.

**Magowor:** It's practically a thousand languages in a trenchcoat. Every word you can think of has a synonym. Just say the words and say em fast and maybe someone will go “ah yes of course I understand completely” eventually

**King Dedede:** PFF

**Magowor:** A common theme is creating words by putting two words together. It gets your point across faster, or adds emphasis if the two words mean the same thing.

**Milkyway Wishes:** simp + twink = sink

**Susie:** Implying that Dark Meta Knight is a twink is still probably the craziest thing you've ever done.

**Magowor:** He has a babyface and I'm right. You're all just cowards.

**Sherlock:** wait is this like the mwishes thing??

**Milkyway Wishes:** ADRSAWADREW

**Magowor:** NO

**Magowor:** It was just me fixing a typo but I made another mistake in the process, that's all

**Rat Bastard:** Say something in halcandran, I wanna see how it looks

**Magowor:** Hyit'katch.

**Rat Bastard:** If that says “something” I will kill you

**Susie:** It says “anything”, but the meaning is “something”

**Rat Bastard:** You're on thin fucking ice

**Magowor:** Okay okay, here, have a sentence

**Magowor:** Kirby'pachi se vun chawaiiyahannan chirru.

**Susie:** D'aw.

**Rat Bastard:** Alright, I understand “Kirby”

**King Dedede:** What's it say?

**Magowor:** “My friend Kirby is very cute.”

**Sherlock:** :O !!

**Susie:** Technically it says “Kirby the Kind is a very cute and good friend”

**Sherlock:** _:O !!!!!!_

**Magowor:** That's probably how I would've translated it if I hadn't gotten much sleep, yeah, but that's not how this language works

**King Dedede:** Ease up on the excited gasps, Kirby, you'll eat your phone

**Meta Knight:** Susie speaks Halcandran?

**Susie:** I spent a long time in Another Dimension. It's sort of inevitable to encounter a Halcandran there eventually.

**Meta Knight:** Does anyone else here speak Halcandran?

**Milkyway Wishes:** konchi amatseten

**Meta Knight:** Of course.

**Milkyway Wishes:** you pick things up from mags

**Sherlock:** whats that mean?

**Susie:** Do not repeat that.

**Magowor:** do NOT repeat that

**Rat Bastard:** TEACH ME THE FORBIDDEN WORDS WISH

**Milkyway Wishes:** well konchi means hello

**Magowor has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 5 minutes!**

**Rat Bastard:** MAGOLOR, YOU KONCHI

**Magowor:** That does actually mean hello

**Rat Bastard:** Aw rats

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “👎”_

**Sherlock:** how do i say i love you in halcandran?

**Magowor:** “Hi dah'hiakin enya chet'fen.”

**Sherlock:** ok!!

**Sherlock:** hi dah'hiakin enya chet'fen!!!!

**Rat Bastard:** AWW

**Meta Knight:** Oh, Kirby, you sweetheart

**Magowor:** I have aslight correction to make

**Magowor:** A slight*, sorry, really getting into the halcandran mindset apparently

**Magowor:** As adorable as you are for doing that I used the wrong form of love for that kind of message, replacing “enya” with “gyet” should fix that

**Sherlock:** hi dah'hiakin _gyet_ chet'fen!!!!!!!!

**Meta Knight:** What's the difference?

**Magowor:** You ask a lot of questions

**Susie:** Romantic versus platonic

**King Dedede:** Oh whoops

**Rat Bastard:** “I love you” vs “I love you (no homo)”

**Magowor:** NO.

**Meta Knight:** Asking questions is a very important way to correct miscommunications and learn in general, and I will not apologize for doing so.

**Magowor:** Oh that wasn't an insult, it was an observation

**Magowor:** I can totally respect that, yeah.

**Meta Knight:** Thank you for understanding.

**Susie:** Meta Knight is the only person here I respect.

**Magowor:** How does it feel to be the most mature server member?

**Rat Bastard:** His ship has his own face plastered all over it

**King Dedede:** This dude REGULARLY hands a baby a sword

**Sherlock:** you should see him at parfait hour

**Magowor:** The fact that he is still the most mature server member despite all that (parfait hour??) makes this a train of you all insulting yourselves

**Susie:** Hm.

**Susie:** Magolor, DM me.

**Magowor:** Alright?

**Rat Bastard:** wait

**Rat Bastard:** Does that mean both the mods are gone?

**Milkyway Wishes:** bitch

**Rat Bastard:** Does that mean that anyone who could potentially silence me is gone?

**Milkyway Wishes:** BITCH.

**ow, the edge:** Oh, dear...

**Rat Bastard:** “clears throat”

**Rat Bastard:** AMATSETEN MOTHERFUCKERS

**Rat Bastard:** GFBCHBNCSHHJMOKCM,GTSESRXZSRXZCRXVERRZDZWAQWZXERDTF6GHTY8U8YG5B76TNYVGCDRTZDCXVBCFGVNHBJVCBGCNVHJMJ

**Meta Knight:** WHY

**Milkyway Wishes:** thats redundant

**Rat Bastard:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Rat Bastard:** okay I'm done

**Meta Knight:** I wish I could silence you.

\-------

_7:03 PM_

**Magowor:** t̴͓͕̃͗͜͝e̶̹̞̿̕s̷̞͈̑̈̐t̵͙̍́̿

**Magowor:** Ọ̵̤̥͘͝͝h̶̻̽͌̎ ̴̪̺͒ͅh̵͍̺̅e̴̺͊͊̑y̵̪̫̥̅̆̅,̴̺̾̍ ̴͎̤̈́̏̿į̴̿t̷͓̳͝ ̷̲͐͊̚w̴̦̻̅o̵͓̮͉͊̓̚r̶̹͒k̸̬͚̳̽s̸̨̉!̶͚̙̲̌

**King Dedede:** NO IT DOESN'T

**Magowor: Ơ̷̲̙͚̦̪͒̅̕̚H̷͇̟̭͊̉,̴̡̠̠̲̥̯̎͂̏̄̚͘ ̷̢̬̮̹̬͐̾̃̒N̶̫̪̻͐̈́O̵͕͊͆͌̏͂̚ ̶̩͌͊Î̵̧̧̫͍̦͙̐T̸͈͉̮͍͈͐ ̴͈͍̺͆͘Ď̸̢̫̲̪͕͊͛O̷̤̗̗̰̯̒̈́͊͗̚͝E̷̬͗͋̿̾S̸̡̛͍̟̒̿̑͒͝N̵̤̝̲̦̩̤̓'̷̰͔́́͗̂́͝T̶̢̅͊͝**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I have a document full of Halcandran words, many of which were used in this chapter. Every Halcandra sentence also does not directly translate to English; "Kirby the Kind" is a reference to how Japanese works and "I give my love to you" is the direct translation for the other sentence.
> 
> (also the opinions of Magolor are not necessarily my opinions DMK is NOT a twink)


	7. The Prequel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chat learns a couple things about programming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a shorter chapter, but I think it's a fun one :)

_5:03 PM_

**ow, the edge:** Alright, it's been bothering me for a while now. I have to ask.

**ow, the edge: @Heroes** , how did you manage to break your chat SO BADLY that Susie needed three weeks to fix it.

**Meta Knight:** I believe **@Susie** might have an easier time explaining the mechanics of it.

**Susie:** Short answer? Unintentional injection hack, followed by several intentional injection hacks.

**Sherlock:** i typed a winky face and things started breaking

**Sherlock:** daroach thought it was funny and kept doing it...

**Magowor:** How in the world did you manage to break an entire chat with an emoji?

**Susie is quoting 7 messages from “* Dream Friends! *”**

> **Hero of Dreamland, Lover of Cake:** he didn't say no!
> 
> **Hero of Dreamland, Lover of Cake:** he just said it was “unlikely due to his schedule, but I will double check”;)
> 
> **Marshmallow:** I hope he can make it!)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Marshmallow:** uhhh)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Hero of Dreamland, Lover of Cake:** what's that?)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Your Royal Highness:** What did you do>style-!italics! ?)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Hero of Dreamland, Lover of Cake: @Susie** HELP)style-alignLeft-important!;

**Susie:** Like I said: injection hack.

**Susie:** Quotation marks are used for text boxes, making it so that the computer doesn't try to understand what it's saying.

**Susie:** Semicolons are used to end lines of code.

**Susie:** Typing an end-quote and a semicolon will end a line of code prematurely and, as you can see, that might break something.

**Susie:** Kirby's typo created a fixable issue... but Daroach's amusement created a much more difficult problem.

**Magowor:** Uh oh.

**Susie:** Upon discovering he could change the code by typing messages he eventually found a way to make the chat close itself entirely.

**Rat Bastard:** Excuse me, I didn't find a way to shut down the chat

**Rat Bastard:** That was Kirby.

**Rat Bastard is quoting 6 messages from “* Dream Friends! *”**

> **Thief of Cake:** text **>** style-italics&bold+italics&bold+italics&bold+italics&bold)style-alignCenter-important!;
> 
> **Your Royal Highness:** text>DAROACH_,_PLEASE_!>style-null)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Thief of Cake:** text>I_wonder_if_I_could_break_the_nicknames_,_too_.>style-null)style-alignLeft-important!;
> 
> **Hero of Dreamland, Lover of Cake:** text>STOP;
> 
> **FATAL EXCEPTION OCCURED**
> 
> **SHUTTING DOWN...**

**ow, the edge:** This seems like it was... too easy to do.

**Susie:** Yes, I know, flimsy code. I didn't think I'd need to do anything complex for you people, but you've proved me wrong. I'm using the assigned weeks to idiot-proof the code, which means I'm practically overhauling everything.

**Magowor:**...If I typed a quotation mark and a semicolon could I replicate the bug Kirby created?

**Milkyway Wishes:** “;

**Milkyway Wishes:** test

**Milkyway Wishes:** DAMMIT

**Susie:** No. No you could not, because I fixed it.

**Susie has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 5 minutes!**

**Susie:** Sit in time out and think about what you've done.

_Milkyway Wishes has reacted with “😔“_

**Meta Knight:** So, if Dreamland, Popstar, or the universe was put in danger again, would you have added the perpetrator to this chat after all was said and done?

**Susie:** Not necessarily.

**Susie:** As I said earlier, I already knew these people. It was a bit of a coincidence that they all happened to have fought Kirby.

**Susie:** But that shared experience allowed us to bond more, and it sort of set a precedent for this chat.

**Susie:** I had actually planned to add Taranza and Daroach to this chat under the promise that they don't tell Kirby about the chat or the people in it

**Susie:** That never ended up happening, of course, since you all broke your chat and needed to be relocated.

**Taranza:**...you think i'm evil??

**Magowor:** For you this chat would be a judgment free place to talk about your fight against Kirby or any other misdeeds you may have done, and possibly the trauma associated. Not necessarily “ur evil come to the dark side we have cookies”

**Milkyway Wishes:** absolutely not nobody here thinks your evil

**Magowor:** You're*

**Milkyway Wishes:** see that? THAT is cold blooded villainy

**Milkyway Wishes:** you are a fuzzy dreamlander with a garden and a sunhat

**Milkyway Wishes:** if susie had added you alone you would've been the purest being here

**ow, the edge:** Who says he isn't the purest being here?

**Milkyway Wishes:**...kirby.

**Milkyway Wishes:** I mean kirby exists, not, like, he said taranza wasnt pure

**Magowor:** Kirby has almost killed over half the people in this chat.

**Milkyway Wishes:** you make a good point

**Ribbon:**...maybe gooey?

**Gooey:** :D

**ow, the edge:** He is Dark Matter.

**Gooey:** D:

**Meta Knight:** Ribbon and Adeleine are children. They are pure.

**Milkyway Wishes:** IF YOU THINK KIDS ARE PURE YOU ARE AN ONLY CHILD AND NOT A FATHER

**Magowor:** I second that.

**Sherlock:** you have siblings?!?!

**Milkyway Wishes:** i dont think knowing that will help you

**Sherlock:** not you, i meant maggie

**Milkyway Wishes:** EVERY NICKNAME YOU GIVE HIM IS ADORABLE

**Magowor:** Halcandrans are born in small litters.

**Sherlock:** :D

**King Dedede:** I think Bandan gets the most pure award here

**Magowor:** I watched him slay a four-headed wyvern. He was swift and merciless. No.

**Bandan Dee:** i did that in the name of friendship!! YOUR friendship!!!!

**Bandan Dee:** besides, taranza kidnapped the king.

**King Dedede:** In the name of love, so he gets the same excuse.

**Susie:** Bandana Dee and Taranza are tied for Most Pure Being, then.

**Taranza:** do we get an award?

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Taranza's name to “Flower Child”**

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Bandan Dee's name to “Marshmallow”**

**Milkyway Wishes:** yes. yes you do.


	8. (Be Careful) Whatcha Wish For?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A couple games are played and things get re-organized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on a real, actual conversation!

_8:09 PM_

**Marshmallow:** can we play a game or something

**Sherlock:** yeah!

**Meta Knight:** Why not

**Milkyway Wishes:** i like games

**Marshmallow:** if you could have any superpower what would it be

**Milkyway Wishes:** FLIGHT

**Milkyway Wishes:** OR LIKE, RAW STRENGTH, OR BOTH

**King Dedede:** I dunno, x-ray vision might be cool

**Milkyway Wishes:** you can never turn it off

**Magowor:** The power to create new universes.

**Meta Knight:** Because of course you would.

**Milkyway Wishes:** and the meaning of life to everything you create is to destroy you

**Sherlock:** the power to cure anything!

**Milkyway Wishes:** by giving the ailment to yourself instead

**Milkyway Wishes:** OOO, OR TO ANYONE ELSE JUST IN GENERAL!

**Marshmallow:** Wishes

**Marshmallow:** Why

**Milkyway Wishes:** it's more fun this way

**Milkyway Wishes:** be careful what you wish for, y'know?

**Meta Knight:** Alright: You can manipulate gravity, creating isolated fields of differentiated gravity, or even small gravity wells

**Magowor:** But every time you do it, you manipulate the normal gravitational pull of the entire planet, and the force gets weaker the more you use it

**Marshmallow:** Ok... you have the power to grow or shrink at will

**Milkyway Wishes:** your brain becomes a lot less useful when you grow smaller

**Magowor:** There is no in-between, you don't ever stop growing or shrinking and you must constantly flip between the two to look normal

**Marshmallow:** Who hurt you

**Magowor:** I think you know EXACTLY why I'm so cautious about the side effects of super powers

**Stabby McStabface:** You can teleport anywhere. No limits.

**King Dedede:** Your clothes don't come with you

**Meta Knight:** It's not the instantaneous version of teleportation, and you can't see where you're moving, therefore you could easily smash into any object in your path.

**Milkyway Wishes:** you CAN teleport anywhere, but 90% of the time it's a public restroom instead of wherever you wanted to go

**Magowor:** You can tell at a glance whether someone has good or ill intentions, and what those intentions are

**Milkyway Wishes:** sadly those intentions are contagious, and you'll copy them.

**Sherlock:** you can change people's faces! like make them smile or frown and stuff

**Milkyway Wishes:** your face also changes, but in the opposite way

**Sherlock:** the power to makes wishes come true

**Milkyway Wishes:** ohohoho...

**Milkyway Wishes:** it doesn't matter what the person wishes for, you HAVE to grant it, no exceptions.

**Milkyway Wishes:** bring back the dead? sure! heal someone? sure! off someone? sure! summon a dark god? sure! world domination? sure!

**Meta Knight:** Of course, the way of the Nova.

**Milkyway Wishes:** ah yes **,** a man of culture

**Meta Knight:** Heh.

**Milkyway Wishes:** did you make a wish, or do you just have something in mind?

**Meta Knight:** I wished to fight the greatest warrior in the galaxy in an attempt to prove my strength.

**Stabby McStabface:** Hmph.

**Milkyway Wishes:** huh. not bad, i can definitely see where that might cause problems but otherwise it's a 6/10 from me

**Meta Knight:**...There was no joke to be had there

**Milkyway Wishes:** im not rating a joke im rating your wish

**Milkyway Wishes:** like, what if YOU were the strongest warrior in the galaxy? would she teleport you to yourself or make a clone of you to fight?

**Milkyway Wishes:** plus if you lost the fight and the greatest warrior was evil then there'd be serious problems

**Milkyway Wishes:** what if she just summoned kirby

**Sherlock:** i'd be flattered!

**Meta Knight:** I suppose those are valid concerns, however everything went fine.

**Meta Knight:**...What did _you_ wish for?  
  


**Milkyway Wishes:** power

**Milkyway Wishes:** WAIT

**Meta Knight:** Gotcha.

**Sherlock:** :O

**Milkyway Wishes:** NONONONONONONO WAIT

**Milkyway Wishes:** I JST MISSPOKE

**Milkyway Wishes:** I MEANT I WOULD

**Milkyway Wishes:** LIKE AS A VILLIN THATS OBVIIUS YKNOW

**Meta Knight:** You're panicking.

**Milkyway Wishes:** IM FINE

**Milkyway Wishes:** im fine

**Sherlock:**...so.

**Milkyway Wishes:** no

**Sherlock:** i've had a bit of a hunch for a little while.

**Milkyway Wishes:** no

**Magowor:** Oh, shit...

**Sherlock:** you rate jokes like you're somehow an expert on the subject

**Milkyway Wishes:** no

**Sherlock:** it ALSO seems like you rate wishes like your an expert too

**Milkyway Wishes:** no

**Sherlock:** of course, while you didn't choose your name, it has “wishes” in it as well

**Milkyway Wishes:** No

**Sherlock:** you did choose a nickname with “galactic” in it though, you live in space, and of course, nova's full name IS galactic nova

**Milkyway Wishes:** No

**Sherlock:** you have teeth. i'm gonna go ahead and say they're fangs.

**Milkyway Wishes:** No

**Sherlock:** you're prone to lying and called me gullible once

**Milkyway Wishes:** No

**Sherlock:** you said you wanted to be subtly creepy like dmk's not having a reflection, and maggie said you actually were. he didn't say what it was, but it's all i needed to know. i know your eyes look big and cute but are slitted when the light hits them.

**Milkyway Wishes:** NO

**Sherlock:** you're from popstar.

**Milkyway Wishes:** NO

**Sherlock:** really, i dont think anything else needs to be said...

**Milkyway Wishes:** NO

**Sherlock:** except that your not marx cuz marx is dead.

**Milkyway Wishes:**.

**Milkyway Wishes:** w

**Milkyway Wishes:** what

**Sherlock:** you heard me

**Sherlock:** you arent marx, because marx has been dead since ???? and so it cant be you

**Milkyway Wishes:** wait

**Milkyway Wishes:** hang on

**Meta Knight:** Of course it isn't Marx. How could it be? He's dead.

**Milkyway Wishes:** hey

**Sherlock:** EXACTLY!

**Marshmallow:** yeah, I mean, everybody knows that

**Milkyway Wishes:** hey!

**Magowor:** Yup. Definitely dead.

**Milkyway Wishes:** HEY!

**Sherlock:** hm?

**Sherlock:** whats up, wishes?

**Milkyway Wishes:** CUT THAT OUT!

**Sherlock:** i have no idea what your talking about

**Sherlock:** anyways, marx is dead

**Milkyway Wishes:** STOP

**Milkyway Wishes:** STOP TELLING PEOPLE I'M DEAD!

**Sherlock:** y'know

**Sherlock:** sometimes i still hear his voice

**Milkyway Wishes:** UGH

**Milkyway Wishes:**

**Milkyway Wishes:** i lived, bitch.

**Sherlock:** it's good to see you again <3

**Milkyway Wishes:** …

**Milkyway Wishes:** yeah

**Milkyway Wishes:** yeah, its good to see you again, too.

**ow, the edge:** That was impressively cold, Kirby.

**Magowor:** I know, right? I didn't think you _could_ be sassy!

**Sherlock:** hehe! Marx isnt the only prankster around!

**Milkyway Wishes:** definitely the best one though!

**Marshmallow:** oh, wow

**Marshmallow:** i'd heard about the wings, but seeing them is so different

**Milkyway Wishes:** you like em?

**Adeleine:** OHHH MY GOODNESS LOOKIT THE SPARKLY GOLD RAINBOW WINGS!!!?!?!

**Adeleine:** WITH THE SHINY CRYSTAL HEARTS OH MY GOSH

**Milkyway Wishes:** uhh

**Adeleine:** CAN YOU TAKE ANOTHER PICTURE I WANNA DRAW THEM

**Magowor:** Wow

**Adeleine:**...please? Sorry

**Magowor:** I think that's the most words you've said in this chat

**Adeleine:** i'm sorry, i got excited >.<

**Magowor:** Oh right, your picture had a sketchbook in it! I forgot you were an artist.

**Sherlock:** oh! that'd be a super pretty painting!

**Milkyway Wishes:** gimme like two seconds Mag is helping me with the picture

**Sherlock:** ill use the new picture for the friend list instead of the super grumpy one

**Milkyway Wishes:**

**Meta Knight:** Incredible...

**Adeleine:** eeeeeee! so pretty!!

**Marshmallow:** WOW your wings are huge

**Milkyway Wishes: @Adeleine** i feel like you should know that the rainbow parts change color

**Adeleine:** * o *

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Adeleine's nickname to “Excitable Artist”**

**Milkyway Wishes:** something something, french girls. go nuts

**Sherlock:** oh right, dont you get a silly nickname?

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh yeah!

**Magowor:** I see nothing wrong with Milkyway Wishes!

**ow, the edge:** I see nothing wrong with the title “Milkyway Wishes”.

**Stabby McStabface:** I believe there's nothing wrong with Milkyway Wishes.

**Milkyway Wishes:** DAMMIT

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh well

**Milkyway Wishes:** there's something funny about this name but i can't quite place it

**Sherlock:** yeah i thought the same thing!

**King Dedede:** Hang on

**King Dedede:** Did Stabby just win?!

**Stabby McStabface:** There are winners in this contest?

**Milkyway Wishes:** 2nd place baybee!

**Magowor:** I don't think you can really win this. I mean, Kirby can just keep guessing until he finds you out.

**Magowor:** Last person found out is impressive, though!

**Stabby McStabface:** No. I won.

**ow, the edge:** Suit yourself.

**Magowor:** That's what I thought you'd say, you victory-obsessed idiot.

**Milkyway Wishes:** cranky because you lost, aren't you

**ow, the edge:** How can one person be so hypocritical?

**Magowor:** Are you implying that I'm a victory-obsessed idiot?

**ow, the edge:** Yes.

**Milkyway Wishes:** yes

**Stabby McStabface:** Yes.

**Meta Knight:** Yes.

**King Dedede:** Yes

**Bandan Dee:** yes

**Sherlock:** yes

**Magowor:** Okay well fuck all of you I guess geez

**Sherlock:** the only reason I dont know who stabby is is cuz he's super quiet!

**Magowor:** He's normally pretty quiet.

**Sherlock:** actually i think the only thing i know about him is that he's a knight??

**Sherlock:** i don't know a lot of knights so its something i guess

**Susie:** Speaking of knights...

**Magowor:** Oh are you really doing this?

**Sherlock:**??

**Susie:** I think it's safe to say that you're all getting along just fine. This chat has practically become a perfect fusion between the Dream Friends chat and The Secret Hideout chat.

**Susie:** That being said, we can't really treat it like either.

**Susie has changed the name of the chat to “Star Allies”!**

**Sherlock:** :O

**Milkyway Wishes:** OH????

**ow, the edge:** This is new...

**Susie:** I have one more change to make.

**Susie:** All of us together are an extremely chaotic force, so one admin and 1.5 moderators isn't quite going to cut it.

**Susie:** I've already discussed this with Magolor. So:

**Susie has promoted Meta Knight to Moderator!**

**Meta Knight:** Oh!?

**King Dedede:** OH WHAT

**Marshmallow:**!!!!!

**Sherlock:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Susie:** Please, for the love of god, help us keep everyone in line...

**Meta Knight:** I will do my best.

**Rat Bastard:** WOOP WOOP THIS IS OUR CHAT NOW MOTHERFUCKERS

**Meta Knight has silenced Rat Bastard for 5 minutes!**

**Magowor:** Oh my stars this was the best decision we've ever made

**Susie:** I am going to sleep for the next week, I leave Meta Knight in charge of everything

**Meta Knight:** Hold on

**Susie:** GOODNIGHT.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter.
> 
> But the next chapter?
> 
> Is my favorite.


	9. People of the Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The newest moderator has a busy night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DERFINITELY DIDN'T ALMOST FORGET TO POST THIS NOPE-
> 
> Anyways, here's my favorite chapter. If any part of this sounds familiar, just know that I wrote this chapter before any... conversations happened.

_11:50 PM_

**Milkyway Wishes:** PEOPLE OF THE NIGHT

**Meta Knight:** What do you want, Marx.

**Milkyway Wishes:** jeez you make it sound so personal

**Milkyway Wishes:** hang out with me

**Coo:** Aren't you in space or something?

**Magowor:** Yes

**Magowor:** I would visit Popstar but I'm pretty sure we're both enemies of Dreamland and will be destroyed on sight

**King Dedede:** By royal decree you are not an enemy of Dreamland

**King Dedede:** Don't make me regret it

**Magowor:** I would visit Popstar but I'm exhausted and the last time I plotted a course late into the night I dreamed that I was still doing the calculations and it was like I never stopped working

**Magowor:** Do not recommend.

**Susie:** I hate piloting at night, too.

**Meta Knight:** I thought you were sleeping for the rest of the week?

**Magowor:** Workaholic.

**Susie:** Hush.

**Rat Bastard:** Why are you all awake

**King Dedede:** Just enjoying a late night!

**Coo:** Owl.

**Meta Knight:** Bat.

**ow, the edge:** Bat as well.

**Susie:** Work.

**Magowor:** Play.

**Milkyway Wishes:** insomnia.

**Flower Child:** Stargazing

**Marshmallow:** king.

**Rat Bastard:** Right I get what you were all going for here but some of ya'll need more than one word answers

**Marshmallow:** i am guarding/hanging out with the King

**Milkyway Wishes:** Local Noddy Doesn't Sleep Ever, Terrorizes Other Noddies, And Is Banished To Space, Continues To Not Sleep.

**Magowor:** Earlier I was reminded of the existence of my minecraft world, and now I've started another huge project. I refuse to stop for sleep.

**Magowor:** Also Marx, you can't fool me, I have seen you sleeping before.

**Milkyway Wishes:** no you haven't <3

**Flower Child:** hang on, you're a noddy that doesn't sleep?

**Milkyway Wishes:** choose your next words carefully.

**Flower Child:**...that's interesting?

**Milkyway Wishes:** you pass the test.

**Rat Bastard:** Hey wait now I have a new question; what is everyone??

**Magowor:** I am a faelyne.

**Susie:** Cybaron.

**Flower Child:** Waspider!

**Marshmallow:** gee, i wonder what my answer is

**King Dedede:** Penguin!

**Meta Knight:** Astral.

**ow, the edge:** Technically an astral, also technically a refection.

**Coo:**...Owl.

**Milkyway Wishes:** in case it wasnt clear i am the most annoying noddy youll ever meet

**Meta Knight:** You take pride in this?

**Milkyway Wishes:** i take pride in this.

**Susie:** It's kind of hard to be annoying while asleep.

**Milkyway Wishes:** haha! shut up.

**Flower Child:**...snoring??

**Magowor:** It is easy to be annoying while sleeping if you _snore,_ obviously

**Magowor:** Oh taranza same hat

**Meta Knight:** You can also fall asleep in an inconvenient spot. That could be annoying.

**King Dedede:** Also sleeptalking or sleepwalking!

**Milkyway Wishes:** get fucked susie

**Milkyway Wishes:** alright brb i need snacks

**Rat Bastard:** Coward leaves before he can be punished by the admin

**Milkyway Wishes:** i see you only stopped being a bastard to ask your questions

**Flower Child:** … what is Kirby??

**King Dedede:** A friend!

**Meta Knight:** An astral.

**Meta Knight:** A much more powerful one than I am, at that.

**ow, the edge:** Meta Knight

**ow, the edge:** I'd like to speak with you privately, for a moment.

**Meta Knight:** Alright

**Meta Knight:** Will you two be alright moderating for me while I'm gone?

**Susie:** I can handle it.

**Magowor:** Actually Marx needs me for something so it'll be just you, Susie.

**Susie:** I can still handle that.

**Rat Bastard:** You two go talk to your boyfriends, we'll behave

**Rat Bastard:** I wonder if Mag tops.

**King Dedede:** Oh, definitely not

**Magowor:** exCUSE ME

_Several people are typing..._

\-------

_12:11 AM_

_Meta Knight > Dark Meta Knight_

**Meta Knight:** What.

**Dark Meta Knight:** So hostile. I haven't even said anything yet.

**Meta Knight:** I'm sure you know very well that I don't trust you.

**Meta Knight:** You agreeing to Kirby's game is a very small step forward.

**Dark Meta Knight:** I am aware.

**Dark Meta Knight:** Listen. This is a difficult request for me to make, but I'm afraid that a sacrifice of pride is in order.

**Dark Meta Knight:** I am asking that you repair the mirror.

**Meta Knight:** No.

**Dark Meta Knight:** Hear me out.

**Meta Knight:** You have one chance to explain yourself. Go.

**Dark Meta Knight:** Our world isn't safe.

**Dark Meta Knight:** Kirby – our Kirby – is far more frail than yours. They are not comprised of the same components despite the reflection element, and this imperfect copy is not yet fit to tend to a harsher, more complex world.

**Dark Meta Knight:** Unfortunately, the world is over prepared to face a defense such as Kirby.

**Dark Meta Knight:** The threats we face require a full, organized team like your side has – but from what I've gathered from seeing you all interact...

**Dark Meta Knight:** You all know each other. To an incredible degree, really. You have allies all around you, everywhere you look, you make a new friend.

**Dark Meta Knight:** But here, on the dark side of the mirror, it's survival of the fittest. I'm not sure if we even have a “bandana dee”, our King Dedede is a tyrant who wouldn't even consider assisting us, and then it's just me and Kirby... but we do not even work together the way you do.

**Dark Meta Knight:** On top of this, it means Kirby has no support group for his emotional health, either. This child is routinely attacked by great, flaming eyeballs, traitors, and merciless killers, all whilst needing to succeed for the universe's sake, and there's nobody there to help him sleep at night.

**Dark Meta Knight:** He needs help. I need help. Where he can't win, I must struggle to pick up the slack. You may have already noticed that I bear many more scars for my efforts.

**Dark Meta Knight:** I ask that you repair the mirror, and help Kirby in any way you can. Help us protect our world, because we can't do it alone. In exchange, I will fulfill the obligations of Kirby's game, and assist you in return.

**Dark Meta Knight:** And if not that... then all I ask is for you to repair it, for the briefest of moments, so I can send Kirby to you. Let him live a better life while this world inevitably falls.

**Meta Knight:**...I will consider it. I will have to speak about it with Kirby.

**Meta Knight:** I do, wholeheartedly, understand. I don't know what I'd do without everyone, and the thought of Kirby, alone and in pain... I can't stomach the thought.

**Dark Meta Knight:** I look forward to your decision.

**Meta Knight:**...I am proud of you for asking for our assistance. Just another step in the right direction.

**Dark Meta Knight:** …

**Dark Meta Knight:** Good talk.

\-------

_12:23 AM_

**King Dedede:** LOOK, ALL I'M SAYING IS THEY BOTH WANTED INFINITE POWER;

**King Dedede:** ONE GOT IT BY ASKING POLITELY

**King Dedede:** AND THE OTHER GOT IT BY SURRENDERING HIS BODY, SOUL, AND MIND TO A BEING WITH “MASTER” IN IT'S NAME

**Flower Child:** SRDTFSDDSEWRASEDADWEA

**Magowor:** FOR THE LAST TIME

**Magowor:** _WE ARE NOT DATING_

**Marshmallow:** BUT YOU LITERALLY LIVE ON A SHIP TOGETHER!!

**Meta Knight:**...What have I just walked into.

**Magowor:** WE'RE JUST ROOMMATES

**Susie:** Oh my god, they were roommates...

**Meta Knight:** Apparently you two will NOT be alright.

**ow, the edge:** What even...

**Meta Knight has silenced Magowor for 5 minutes!**

**Meta Knight:** Did you even go talk to Marx like you were going to?!

**King Dedede:** Nope!

**Meta Knight:** Don't sound so smug, you're the one in trouble.

**Meta Knight:** I just needed to get him to calm down.

**Meta Knight has silenced King Dedede for 1 hour!**

**Meta Knight has silenced Rat Bastard for 1 hour!**

**Meta Knight:** There are children present, you two.

_Rat Bastard has reacted with “😠“_

**Meta Knight:**...How do I turn that off.

**Susie:** You can't.

**Susie:** I blame Marx for revealing this loophole.

**Susie:** Luckily, Daroach doesn't have nickname privileges like Marx does.

**Meta Knight:** I feel like there's a story behind that.

**Magowor:** I'd like to thank Meta Knight for reminding me to check on Marx, because that was almost a disaster

**Flower Child:** what did he want in the first place?

**Magowor:** Apparently, he needed help with something on the top shelf.

**Magowor:** He can't grab things with his talons and fly at the same time, so he usually has me grab things for him

**Magowor:** Walked into the kitchen to find a leaning tower of furniture with one dumbass on top, trying to open a cookie jar that I had ducttaped shut.

**Flower Child:** oh no

**Susie:** Hehe, “on top”,

**Magowor:** If I could silence you I would.

**Marshmallow:** did you open it for him??

**Magowor:** Oh of course, depriving Marx of food is a great way to get a planet destroyed.

**Susie:** Of course you opened it for him, you'd do whatever he told you to.

**Magowor:** Not Dating(tm)

**Susie:** I never said you were.

**King Dedede has changed their name to “you two not dating does not change the fact that you are the universe's biggest bottom”**

**Magowor has changed you two not dating does not change the fact that you are the universe's biggest bottom's name to “BEGONE, THOT”**

**Magowor has kicked BEGONE, THOT from the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Flower Child:** WOAH

**Susie:** That's an abuse of power!

**Magowor:** The evil is defeated.

**Susie has added King Dedede to the chat “Star Allies”.**

**Susie has silenced Magowor for 30 minutes!**

**King Dedede:** test

**King Dedede:** KARMA'S A BITCH

**Susie has silenced King Dedede for 1 day!**

**Susie:** _Shut the fuck up, I'm trying to keep the peace you dumb bitch!_

**Meta Knight:** This chat fell to pieces the second I left.

**Milkyway Wishes:** hang on im laughing too hard at that

**Milkyway Wishes:** that was so aggressive

**Milkyway Wishes: “** BE CALM AND QUIET YOU PIECES OF SHIT”

**Milkyway Wishes:** very effective, thanks Susie

**Meta Knight:** Welcome back. You caused the problem in the first place.

**Milkyway Wishes:** incredible, since i wasnt even here

**Susie:** A new record.

**Milkyway Wishes:** gimme a sec to read through all this, i gotta see what happened

**Coo:**...Out of curiosity, do you consider yourself a top?

**Flower Child:** ERDSSSAFSASASASDAA??!!???

**Marshmallow:** WHAT

**Susie:** COO?!

_Rat Bastard has reacted with “😯”_

**Milkyway Wishes:** i

**Milkyway Wishes:** wh

**Milkyway Wishes:** are you hitting on me??? i just

**Susie:** OH MY GOD

**Milkyway Wishes:** wtf did i miss...

**Flower Child:** I CANT BELEIVE

_Magowor has reacted with "🖕”_

**Milkyway Wishes:** holy shit are you silenced???

**Milkyway Wishes has unsilenced Magowor!**

**Meta Knight:** You can do that?

**Magowor:** FUCK DEDEDE, DAROACH, SUSIE AND APPARENTLY COO

**Magowor:** BANDAN CAN STAY BUT HES ON THIN FUCKING ICE

**Marshmallow:** i'm valid!

**Milkyway Wishes:** NOBODY @ ME, I'M GOING TO READ.

**Meta Knight:** Enjoy.

**Susie:** And so, all the People of the Night managed to get on Magolor's bad side. Lords have mercy on our souls.

**ow, the edge:** This was quite a thing to witness.

**Meta Knight:** Hold on, I have to check something

**Meta Knight:** You two play nice.

\-------

_12:34 AM_

_Marx > Meta Knight_

**Marx:** idk if this is too much to ask but please please PLEASE stop people from making fun of me and mag's relationship

**Meta Knight:**...I can try. Is everything alright?

**Marx:** well, i mean

**Marx:** i think hes a lil uncomfortable about it and its making me worried

**Marx:** i don't want him to be upset that he's with me

**Marx:** its kinda hard to explain...

**Meta Knight:** You can talk to me about it if you'd like, or not if you'd prefer.

**Marx:** well

**Marx:** yknow how some people just kinda... dont have the right ability??

**Meta Knight:** Of course. I am good friends with a spear-wielding waddle dee, and I trust a hydrokinetic waddle dee enough to be a part of my crew on the Halberd.

**Marx:** right

**Marx:** well i have mirror instead of sleep and its uh

**Marx:** not... really good for my health.

**Marx:** im happy with my abilities and i like being awake, really! its just that noddies are supposed to sleep all the time, like thats normal and healthy... and because I DONT do that, it's uh...

**Marx:** lack of sleep causes a lot of problems. a lot of them are physical, but i also can lose my ability to make good descisions, and it causes anxiety and sometimes depression... its real bad.

**Meta Knight:**...Oh.

**Marx:** oh i better not hear any “that explains a lot” from you

**Meta Knight:** I won't.

**Marx:** its kinda scary. yknow that a common side effect is also hallucinations – thats terrifying. to me, at least, i dunno why that freaks everyone else out

**Marx:** i mean yeah, sometimes i do stupid stuff because of it, just ask kirby, but i need help more than anything else! and thats why i need mags...

**Marx:** hes the only one who really gets it yknow? we're the same... its kinda ironic but the fact that nobody trusts him makes me trust him. he's the only one i trust to give me a reality check, the only one i trust to comfort me, or feel safe enough near to actually sleep...

**Marx:** ugh i definitely rambled too much hang on

**Marx:** i just dont want him to be upset about being with me cuz i dont know what id do if he left

**Marx:** i guess i kinda said that already

**Marx:** just

**Marx:** nevermind, im probably just being paranoid, ignore me

**Meta Knight:** It's alright, Marx. Your concerns are perfectly valid.

**Marx:** wow, im valid?

**Meta Knight:** I recommend you talk about this with Magolor. I'm not brushing you off or anything, I just believe that it's important that you tell him this, especially considering the fact that he's your only support. It will give him the opportunity to reassure you and/or, if this really is you “just being paranoid”, he should be able to help you with that, as well.

**Marx:** right

**Marx:** right, yeah, that makes sense.

**Marx:** sorry for bugging you and like, spilling my emotions everywhere

**Meta Knight:** It's just an emotionally vulnerable night in general, it seems.

**Marx:** heh

\-------

_12:40 AM_

**Magowor:** Hey **@Meta Knight** , don't know where you went but need you to watch the chat for me again

**Meta Knight:** Take your time.

**Magowor:** Okay? I will

**Marshmallow:** the King and i are heading to bed, so thats one and a half less problems for you to deal with

**Meta Knight:** Half?

_King Dedede has reacted with “👍”_

**Marshmallow:** half.

**Meta Knight:** Ah, right.

**Flower Child:** as fun as this was, I also need to sleep

_Rat Bastard has reacted with “👋”_

_Dumb Gay Owl has reacted with “👋”_

**Meta Knight:** … I see Magolor got to you, Coo. Goodnight.

**Susie:** The People of the Night have concluded this meeting, it seems.

**Susie:** I should be heading back to work, anyways.

**Meta Knight:** Try and get some sleep, Susie.

**Susie:** I'll consider it.

**ow, the edge:** …

**Meta Knight:** I'll consider it.

**ow, the edge:** …Good night.

\-------

_1:25 AM_

**Rat Bastard:** Ahem;

**Rat Bastard:** MAGOLOR

**Rat Bastard:** IS

**Rat Bastard:** A

**Rat Bastard:** BOTTOM

**Rat Bastard:** SWDFAESFSGCVFHHVJFTRDGVYDRUYBTFJHGTDFSRTCEYVRDGHFYUJGUGGFFYDTRSRSCDRVFTGNHHIUGYTTTYUYNIUIKJIUYDRFGHJUKUJHDFRGRHTJYKUJHGUYSRDTUTY

**Rat Bastard:** MY WORDS CAN NO LONGER BE CONTAINED

**Rat Bastard:** I SHALL SCREAM IT TO THE HEAVENS

**Rat Bastard:** I WILL NOT BE SILENCED

**Meta Knight has silenced Rat Bastard for 5 hours!**

**Meta Knight:** Hm. Are you sure?

**Magowor:** Thank you.

**Meta Knight:** No problem.

\-------

_1:32 AM_

_Magolor > Meta Knight_

**Magolor:** No. Seriously. Thank you.

**Magolor:**

**Meta Knight:**..No problem.


	10. Celebration Picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meta Knight completes a puzzle that didn't really need solving.

_9:32 PM_

**Milkyway Wishes:** hellooooo everyone!

**Sherlock:** hi marx!!

**Marshmallow:** what's the occasion?

**Meta Knight:** You seem to be in good spirits.

**Milkyway Wishes:** why yes, i am!

**Milkyway Wishes:** just woke up about an hour ago and i feel great!

**Susie:** That's great to hear!

**Susie:** But, if you haven't noticed, it's 9 PM.

**Sherlock:** uhh yeah when did you go to bed??

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh, i slept for 18 hours! :D

**Marshmallow:**...oh!

**Susie:** Oh, indeed.

**Sherlock:** i mean, i can appreciate a good nap and all, but...

**Meta Knight:** That statement is much more reasonable when you remember that he's a noddy, and that they tend to sleep for days at a time.

**Sherlock:** OH RIGHT nvm

**Susie:** Ah, okay.

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh yeah right disclaimer I do NOT recommend any of you try to sleep for that long

**Milkyway Wishes:** but speaking of good naps...

**Marshmallow:** uh oh

**Marshmallow:** i feel the chaos coming on...

_King Dedede has reacted with “🤔”_

**Milkyway Wishes:** OH DSARRSFRDASFFD I FORGOT YOU WERE SILENCED

**Milkyway Wishes:** but yeah anyways mag is asleep

**Milkyway Wishes:** something about trying to fix his janked up sleep schedule idk

**Milkyway Wishes:** and he didn't take the time to put on any pjs or anything but he DID take the time to make himself comfortable

**Susie:** Marx, you're starting to worry me.

**Susie:** What's the punchline here?

**Milkyway Wishes:** … i have pictures >:)

**Meta Knight:** Uh oh.

**Milkyway Wishes:** super rare, difficult to take pictures since he's a super light sleeper and therres NO WAY i could ask for this

**Marshmallow:** im not 100% sure i want these pictures????

**Milkyway Wishes:** ladies...

**Milkyway Wishes:** gentlemen...

**Milkyway Wishes:**...kirby.

**Milkyway Wishes:** BEHOLD;

**Milkyway Wishes:**

****

**Milkyway Wishes:** BEANS.

**Marshmallow:** I AM 100% SURE I WANTED THIS PICTURE.

_King Dedede has reacted with “😯”_

**Sherlock:** OH MY GOODNESS!!!

**Susie:** I didn't know I needed to see this until this very moment.

**Susie:** I feel as though my life is a little more complete.

**Meta Knight:** This is _amazing_ news, thank you Marx.

**Milkyway Wishes:** :3

**Meta Knight:**...Oh. I've just realized something.

_King Dedede has reacted with “🧐”_

**Meta Knight:** I've gained ammunition against Magolor, should I need it.

**Milkyway Wishes:** by knowing he has beans? anyone could scroll up and see em, no blackmail

**Meta Knight:** Not quite.

**Meta Knight:** You see, I also possess an extremely rare photo.

_King Dedede has reacted with “😯”_

**Sherlock:** oh???

**Meta Knight:** Provided by Magolor himself, no less.

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh WHAT

**Meta Knight:** However, it is less the contents of the photo, and more the implications of these two photos together that creates this incredible new weapon.

**Milkyway Wishes:** im shaking what does this mean

**Susie:** I'VE GOT IT

**Susie has changed Magowor's name to “Beholder of Beans”**

**Susie:** There.

**Susie:** What were we talking about? I was busy coming up with nicknames.

**Meta Knight:** Oh, nothing important.

**Milkyway Wishes:** don't do this to me

**Milkyway Wishes:** WHAT DO YOU HAVE META

**Meta Knight:** Oh, nothing important. ;)

**Milkyway Wishes:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Meta Knight has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 5 minutes!**

**Meta Knight:** I can't wait to see his reaction.

_King Dedede has reacted with “👍”_

\-------

_9:07 AM_

**Beholder of Beans:** Good morning!

**Beholder of Beans:** What.

**King Dedede:** HA

**Beholder of Beans:** No, seriously. What.

**Susie:** I don't know how it could be more clear.

**Beholder of Beans:** Really.

**Susie:** You are the Bean Beholder.

**Beholder of Beans:** It's too early for this.

**Beholder of Beans:** Yes, Susie, but _why_ is the question.

**Sherlock:** you

**Sherlock:** have

**Sherlock:** BEANS!!

**Beholder of Beans:** I assure you I don't!

**Sherlock:** YES YOU DO!!

**Beholder of Beans:** There are exactly zero beans aboard the Lor Starcutter!

**Marshmallow:** THERE ARE AT LEAST 12 BEANS ABOARD THE LOR STARCUTTER YOU LIAR

**Beholder of Beans:** OKAY 1; WHY DO YOU THINK THAT AND 2; WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THESE NUMBERS FROM

**Sherlock:** THE LITTLE YELLOW BEANS ON YOUR HANDS!

**Beholder of Beans:** I

**Beholder of Beans:**

****

**Beholder of Beans:** These?!?!

**Marshmallow:** YES

**Sherlock: @everyone** BEANS!!!!!

**Adeleine:** BEANS!!

**ow, the edge:** Beans?

**Ribbon:** OH MY GOSH, BEANS.

**Gooey:** :D

**Dumb Gay Owl:** Oh this was DEFINITELY worth being woken up for. BEANS!

**Kine:** Uh what

**Dumb Gay Owl has changed their name to “Coo”**

**Rick:** Wh??

**Coo:** do NOT ask

**Rat Bastard:** BEANS

**Flower Child:** :O BEANS

**Beholder of Beans:**...Fingerpads. Those are called fingerpads.

**Marshmallow:** how come your hands are blue?? they're brown in the other picture

**Beholder of Beans:**...What other picture.

**Milkyway Wishes:** uh oh

**Beholder of Beans:** MARX, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DID BUT YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS TO RUN.

**Susie:** … **@Marshmallow** , most creatures from Another Dimension have odd, multicolored metallic skin/fur/feathers as a kind of camouflage in the chaotic environment. Faelynes are blue in the light and brown in the dark. On Halcandra, with it's cloudy ashy air, not a lot of bright light gets through, making them the same brown color as the terrain, while in AD-Space a blue and gold palette blends in much better.

**Marshmallow:** oh yeah the shadowed parts of his hand are brown!! I see

**Marshmallow:** i kinda just thought his hands were dirty which is weird cuz he wears gloves all the time

**Beholder of Beans:** I'm back.

**Beholder of Beans has changed their name to “Magolor”**

**Magolor:** All is well.

**Susie has changed Magolor's name to “Magowor”**

**Susie:** All is well.

**Magowor:** Dammit, thought I might've been able to get away with that

**Milkyway Wishes has changed Magowor's name to “Beanholder”**

\-------

_9:21 AM_

_Meta Knight > Magolor_

**Meta Knight:** Before you make another attempt on his life, I would like to discuss Marx with you for a moment.

**Magolor:** You are currently the only reason he's still breathing.

**Meta Knight:** I imagine you're only exaggerating?

**Magolor:** Oh of course

**Magolor:** I'd never really hurt him.

**Meta Knight:** Hm.

**Meta Knight:**...You two really are partners, aren't you?

**Magolor:** Oh no, not you too

**Meta Knight:** All jokes aside. Seriously.

**Magolor:** No.

**Meta Knight:** Unfortunately for you, you have a reputation as a liar and I have a significant amount of evidence, so I don't believe that.

**Magolor:** Oh, really.

**Magolor:** I don't suppose it's anything like Dedede's “evidence” then.

**Meta Knight:** You two have lived together for years, you've been his only support for his mental health and you two bicker like a married couple.

**Meta Knight:** You copy each other's speech patterns, help each other with no questions asked at the drop of a hat, and despite both your reputations you trust each other unwaveringly.

**Meta Knight:** Taking an awfully long time to think of a response, now, are we?

**Magolor:** We could still just be close friends by those terms.

**Meta Knight:** Are you?

**Magolor:** …

**Magolor:**...it's queer-platonic...

**Meta Knight:** There it is.

**Magolor:** Please don't tell the others

**Magolor:** I'd never hear the end of it

**Meta Knight:** Your secret is safe with me.

**Meta Knight:** Forgive me for prying – I felt as though it may be important to know, considering Marx's request to prevent any mockeries.

**Magolor:** I'll be fine.

**Meta Knight:**...Are you alright?

**Magolor:** Yeah I'm fine I just

**Magolor:** I never

**Magolor:** It's just the

**Magolor:** Gal seeche'fana, I don't know the words

**Magolor:** I haven't talked about this and I don't know how, I'm a little shaken up, but I'll be alright.

**Meta Knight:** I know I caused the issue, but if you need someone to talk to...

**Magolor:** I know

**Magolor:** God, we promoted you to moderator and you immediately became the group therapist

**Magolor:** Alright, I made myself laugh, I think I'm okay now.

**Magolor:** Literally all you did was say “i think your dating him because you talk to each other” and it just completely broke me

**Magolor:** Barely even evidence

**Meta Knight:** I did have actual physical evidence but I didn't think I would need to use it. I was right.

**Magolor:** What could you possibly have?

**Meta Knight:** You sent me a picture of Marx sleeping.

**Meta Knight:** Marx sent us a picture of you sleeping.

**Meta Knight:** I couldn't help but notice that you two were sleeping in the same bed.

**Magolor:**...I reserve my right to sleep in the pillow fort.

**Magolor:** It was Marx's idea but I'm the one with the hands, so that makes it both of ours

**Magolor:** You can have my pillow fort over my dead body.

**Magolor:**...plus we sacrificed my mattress to the pillow fort so now that's my only place to sleep.

**Meta Knight:** And of course... did Marx ever tell you what exactly we discussed?

**Magolor:** He was worried I'd be upset if I kept being pestered about our relationship so he begged you to stop people from doing that?

**Meta Knight is quoting 1 message from Marx**

**Marx:** idk if this is too much to ask but please please PLEASE stop people from making fun of me and mag's relationship

**Meta Knight is quoting 1 message from Marx**

**Marx:** i don't want him to be upset that he's with me

**Meta Knight:** I took notice in his word choice here.

**Meta Knight:** “relationship” instead of “friendship”, “with me”.

**Meta Knight:** He practically gave you away.

**Magolor:** Heh

**Magolor:** I think you're playing the wrong guessing game here

**Magolor:** You're supposed to be trying to guess Stabby, not keep pressing me and Marx for more personal info.

**Meta Knight:** Alright alright, I'll let you go.

\-------

_9:42 AM_

**Marshmallow:** can we play a game?

**Marshmallow:** i mean like an actual game, not like the superpower question from last time

**Susie:** Sure, I've got time.

**Milkyway Wishes:** i like games

**Coo:** Might as well while I'm awake.

**Rick:** Yeah sure, let's play!

**Kine:** I'll join

**ow, the edge:** Fine.

**Beanholder:** Oh, I'm always up for a game.

**Gooey:** :)

**Sherlock:** i wanna play a game!

**Excitable Artist:** okay! I'll play!

**Ribbon:** can I join?

**Meta Knight:** I'll play.

**King Dedede:** Count me in!

**Rat Bastard:** YEAH!

**Flower Child:** i'd like to play!

**Marshmallow:** oh, wow

**Marshmallow:** apparently we all wanna play

**Sherlock:** WAIT

**Sherlock: @Stabby McStabface**?

**Stabby McStabface:**...Fine.

**Sherlock:** NOW we have everyone :)

**King Dedede:** What're we playin?

_Marshmallow is typing..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last week: *quietly adds the tags "Marx/Magolor, Kinda"*
> 
> This week: *quietly removes the tag "Kinda"*


	11. A Dangerous Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This might have been a bad idea. Might.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...so anyways welcome to the three part finale (not counting the epilogue)
> 
> Enjoy :)

_9:44 AM_

**Marshmallow:** idk how about truth or dare??

**Milkyway Wishes:** ooo i like that game!

**Meta Knight:** I'm surprised, considering the truth element.

**Milkyway Wishes:** hey do you all remember when maggie said that if you found us out the insults would get personal and you were all like “oh yeah we dont wanna insult you guys we're nice people”

**King Dedede:** I'm up for truth or dare!

**Rat Bastard:** HELL YEAH TRUTH OR DARE

**Marshmallow:** any objections?

**Susie:** How are we going to do dares if we aren't all in the same place?

**Beanholder:** We could take pictures?

**Susie:** I guess that works

**Susie:** How do we determine the order?

**Beanholder:** Alphabetically?

**Rat Bastard:** Whoever shouts the loudest goes first

**Beanholder:** No,

**Milkyway Wishes:** i'm down for that

**Beanholder:** NO,

**King Dedede:** I DARE YA'LL TO RACE TO THE CASTLE AS FAST AS POSSIBLE

**Susie:** Okay so this is NOT how truth or dare works

**Sherlock:** YOULL ALL EAT MY DUST

**Marshmallow:** IM ALREADY HERE, I WIN

  
  
 **Stabby McStabface:** You can win?

**Beanholder:** Did someone say RACE

**Susie:** _This dare is not fair to Stabby and is also NOT HOW THE GAME WORKS_

**Beanholder:** But I wanna race

**Susie:** Then go to the castle...

**King Dedede:** Just tryin to fix the not all in one place issue

**Beanholder:** Oh god nevermind I'd have to input the coords and I don't wanna dig through files right now

**Milkyway Wishes:** you're throwing the game for me mag

**Rat Bastard:** Is there such a thing as a dare that's technically a truth and a truth that's technically a dare?

**Meta Knight:** I already know what you intend to do with this information, please nobody tell him

**Marshmallow:** if you dared someone to come out of the closet, youd be daring them to tell the truth

**Marshmallow:** oops, sorry meta knight! i didnt see it..

**Rat Bastard:** I DARE EVERYONE HERE TO COME OUT OF THE CLOSET

**Susie:** I doubt everyone here is queer, Daroach.

**Rat Bastard:** You're a lesbian Susie you have no right to talk.

**Susie:** I hate that you said that. I hate every part of that. I hate that you had absolutely no evidence to go on, threw out a claim, and it happened to be correct. Fuck you.

**Sherlock:** nonbinary (he/they) and panromantic ace!!

**Susie:** Are we seriously doing this

**Milkyway Wishes:** gayce baybee

**Beanholder:** Gonna have to agree with Susie here: This isn't how the game works.

**Milkyway Wishes:** just admit that you're gay mags

**Beanholder:** EXCUSE me, I'm bi and you know that!

**Milkyway Wishes:** yup. got you to do the dare tho.

**Beanholder:**...Clever. I'm feeling merciful today, so your life will be spared. Aromantic bisexual.

**Rat Bastard:** Pan icon here

**Susie:** You're the one who said the dare, why are _you_ doing it?!

**Beanholder:** Okay can we please get a LITTLE organized here

**Susie:** Okay okay, Magolor, since you and I both want to do this properly; truth or dare?

**Beanholder:** Dare

**Meta Knight:** As if Magolor would choose truth.

**Milkyway Wishes:** 1/10, that's the same joke twice

**Susie:** While I respect your desire to keep things organized, I want you to know that dare was definitely the wrong option. You are going to regret you were ever born. <3

**Beanholder:** Oh, really now? Try me.

**Rat Bastard:** Drama queens.

**Meta Knight has silenced Rat Bastard for 1 minute!**

**Meta Knight:** I'm interested.

**Susie:** Magolor.

**Susie:** I want you,

**Susie:** to post a picture of yourself,

**Beanholder:** oh no

**Susie:** in a box, while looking as overly cute and catlike as possible.

**Beanholder:** … _why._

**Rat Bastard:** SDGHJFDSDFGHJK

  
  
 **Marshmallow:** oooooooohhhhh my gosh im so glad we chose this game!!

**Susie:** Because I've seen a picture of your paws, and now I want more.

**Rat Bastard:** SHE'S HOOKED MAGOLOR SHE'LL NEVER HAVE EBOUGH BEAN PICS

**Beanholder:** I can't fuckin believe this...

**Susie:** It's a dare. You have to do it.

**Milkyway Wishes:** DFGHJHGFDFGHJK

**Milkyway Wishes:** SUSIE

**Milkyway Wishes:** I JUST WATCHED HIM STARE AT HIS PHONE, SO FUCKIN DEFEATED

**Milkyway Wishes:** AND THEN HE SIGHED AND LOOKED AT ME AND ASKED, IN THE MOST TIRED VOICE,

**Milkyway Wishes:** “marx, do we have any cardboard boxes on the ship.”

**Rat Bastard:** ASDFGHJHGFDSDFGHJKJHGFDFGHJK

  
  
 **Rat Bastard:** AHAHAHAHSHAHAHSSASAAA

**King Dedede:** HOOOOOO BOY

  
  
 **Susie:** Oh, this is going to be _glorious_.

**Meta Knight:** Oh my goodness...

**Marshmallow:** KITTY PICS INBOUND!!!

**Sherlock:** CAT!! (i made it to the castle btw)

**Beanholder:** This is ridiculous.

**Beanholder:** “as catlike as possible”? What, would you like a little “nya~!” to go with that, Susie?!

**Susie:** Oh, _absolutely._

**Susie:** wait

**Susie:** WAIT

**Susie has changed Beanholder's name to “Nyagolor”**

**Nyagolor:** Oh my fucking god...

**Millkyway Wishes:** YYYYYEEEEESSSSSSSSS

**Milkyway Wishes:** _10/10_

**Susie:** I am a genius.

**King Dedede:** _NYAGOWOR_

**Meta Knight:** Oh my goodness...

**Susie:** That's barely even coherent...

**Nyagolor:** I think I'll just stick with this. Unfortunately.

**Nyagolor:** This dare is possibly the worst thing ever, actually.

**Nyagolor:**...Is this racist? I think this might be racist.

**Susie:** If it is then I owe you a serious formal apology. I'll have an essay ready should you request it.

**Milkyway Wishes:** you shouldnt take any of his words seriously susie hes just being grumpy

**Milkyway Wishes:** if you could see the amount of effort hes putting into this then youd have no sympathy

**Nyagolor:** I can silence you, you know.

**Milkyway Wishes:** there were two boxes he could fit in on the lor and he deliberately chose the more snug one

**Milkyway Wishes:** HES TAKING THE GLOVES OFF

**Nyagolor has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 5 minutes!**

**Susie has unsilenced Milkyway Wishes!**

**Susie:** No no, let him speak

**Milkyway Wishes:** wow, thats the first time anyones ever let me speak after shutting me up

**Marshmallow:** when can we expect kitty pics marx??

**Nyagolor:** Right now.

**Milkyway Wishes:** say it

**Nyagolor:** I have no idea what you're talking about.

**Milkyway Wishes:** you fuckin liar IM NOT POSTING IT UNTIL YOU SAY THE THING YOU SAID YOU WOULD

**Nyagolor:** That is more incentive to NOT say the thing!

**Milkyway Wishes:** hm, could you remind me what exactly the thing was?

**Nyagolor:** _I'm not letting you get away with this twice, and you're RIGHT NEXT TO ME YOU CAN JUST TALK OUT LOUD._

**Sherlock:** THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME YOU TWO PLEASE

**Rat Bastard:** STOP FLIRTING AND POST CAT PICS

**Meta Knight has silenced Rat Bastard for 5 minutes!**

**Nyagolor has silenced Rat Bastard for 2 minutes!**

**Nyagolor:** Oh oops, thank you Meta Knight.

**King Dedede:**...Oh that gives me an idea

**Nyagolor:** What?

**King Dedede:** Nothin

**Milkyway Wishes:** tick tock maggie SPEAK UP.

**Sherlock:** why is marx posting it?

**Nyagolor:** I had him take the picture.

**Susie:** You'd better show me the damn picture you two!

**Milkyway Wishes:** :)

**Nyagolor:** Fine.

**Nyagolor:** …........ if I fits...

**Milkyway Wishes:**

**Nyagolor:** I sits

**Marshmallow:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Sherlock:** TAIL?!?! FLOOFY TAIL?!?!?!!!!!

**Marshmallow:** BEANS

**Milkyway Wishes:** I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE DELIGHTED IN MY LIFE

**Milkyway Wishes:** THAN WHEN I ASKED MAGS WHY HE PICKED THE SMALLER BOX AND ALL HE HAD TO SAY WAS “Because I fits.”

**Coo:** Oh you absolutely enjoyed that you _liar_

**Nyagolor:** Do you know what the worst part about this is?!

**Rat Bastard:** TAIL AND BEANS TAIL AND BEANS

**Meta Knight:** What is it, Magolor? Cat got your tongue?

**Milkyway Wishes:** absolutely terrible but in the name of making fun of mags, 6/10

**Nyagolor:** Shut the fuck up

**Nyagolor:** The worst part about this is that it's actually really fuckin comfortable.

**King Dedede:** I DIAGNOSE YOU WITH CAT

**Susie:** This is perfection. Bliss, pure and utter bliss. Thank you, Magolor.

**King Dedede:** Hey Marx, truth or dare?

**Nyagolor:** We really are just doing this in no particular order huh.

**Meta Knight:** Again, you might as well just tell him the dare.

**Milkyway Wishes:** aHEM

**Milkyway Wishes:** truth

**Milkyway Wishes:** because fuck you.

**King Dedede:** Thanks for helpin out the cause Mety >:)

**Milkyway Wishes:** oh am i gonna regret this?

**Meta Knight:** What have I just let happen?

**King Dedede:** Marx.

**Milkyway Wishes:** yes stars above just get it over with would you.

**King Dedede:** ARE YOU AND MAGOLOR DATING

**Meta Knight has silenced King Dedede for 10 minutes!**

**Nyagolor has silenced King Dedede for 1 day!**

**Susie has unsilenced King Dedede!**

**Nyagolor has silenced King Dedede for 1 week!**

**Susie:** LET HIM SPEAK

**Susie has unsilenced King Dedede!**

**Nyagolor has silenced King Dedede for 1 week!**

**Nyagolor:** _NO_

**Meta Knight:** Oh dear

**Milkyway Wishes:** uh

**Nyagolor has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 1 hour!**

**Rat Bastard:** ALL HE DID WAS SAY UH

**Nyagolor:** HES NOT ALLOWED TO ANSWER THAT QUESdfghghjkl

**Rat Bastard:** Uhhh

**Nyagolor:** ydfgfghjhjkl

**Susie has unsilenced King Dedede!**

**Susie has unsilenced Milkyway Wishes!**

**King Dedede:** THE PEOPLE NEED ANSWERS, MARX

**King Dedede:** THIS CANT BE KEPT HIDDEN FOREVER

**King Dedede:** ONE DAY WE'RE GONNA GET A STRAIGHT, OR NOT STRAIGHT ANSWER

**Nyagolor:** STOP UNSILENCING HIM DAMMIT

**Susie:** You got your phone back, huh?

**Nyagolor has silenced King Dedede for 1 week!**

**Nyagolor:** Marx is no match for me. Getting my phone back isn't hard.

**Susie:** I get where you're coming from but I believe he's stronger than you magic wise.

**Sherlock:** you two shouldn't fight :(

**Nyagolor:** Oh, don't worry Kirby – I wouldn't _really_ hurt him. If I did I'd heal him right back up anyways.

**Milkyway Wishes:** YES

**Nyagolor:**???

**Susie:** You good Marx?

**Rat Bastard:** WAIT

**Rat Bastard:** WAS THAT

**Rat Bastard:** AN ANSWER

**Nyagolor has silenced Milkyway Wishes for 1 week!**

**Nyagolor:** when did he get unsilenced

**Nyagolor:** when

**Susie:** While you two were fighting.

**Nyagolor:** im gonna kill him

**Sherlock:** DONT FIGHT !!!

**Milkyway Wishes has changed their nickname to “truth = yes”**

**Nyagolor:** I'M GONNA KILL HIM

**Rat Bastard:** AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

**Marshmallow:** OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH

**Meta Knight:** Oh goodness...

**Nyagolor has kicked truth = yes from the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Susie:** Hoooo boy...

**Susie:** Hmm. I'm not sure if I actually want to do this.

**Susie has unsilenced King Dedede!**

**King Dedede:** YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

**Susie has silenced King Dedede for 5 minutes!**

**Susie has removed Nyagolor's moderator privileges!**

**Susie:** Okay.

**Susie has added Marx to the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Susie:** It seems that both Marx and Magolor are both AFK. We have no coverage of the Lor Starcutter, but I have a feeling I know what's going on anyway.

**Meta Knight:**...I've been sworn to secrecy, but I believe I should speak now.

**Rat Bastard:** Oh??

**Meta Knight:** I already knew the two were in a relationship.

**Flower Child:** really?!

**Marshmallow:** OH????

_King Dedede has reacted with “😯”_

**Meta Knight:** Marx requested that I stop you all from making fun of them one night, and I asked Magolor about some of his phrasing.

**Meta Knight:** That being said... could you all be respectful about this?

**Meta Knight:** Both of them were very nervous to tell me about any of this, and I feel like it would be common decency to not poke any more fun. I'm sure you've stressed them enough with your prying.

**Susie:** Ah, okay.

**King Dedede:** Aw geez... I woulda stopped if I'd known it was a touchy subject... My apologies.

**Marshmallow:** oh, oopsie! yeah we'll be nice!

**Sherlock:** definitely!! im glad they're happy together (i think??), i wouldnt want them to be upset about it!!!

**Rat Bastard:** Yeah definitely. It was all in good fun – if I knew they weren't happy about it I would've shut up about it.

**Marx:** hey

**Marx:** thanks

**King Dedede:** Hey youre back! Uhh, pass the message on to Mags, sorry for hounding you guys

**Marx:** “you think”??

**Sherlock:** you guys seem to fight super often :(

**Marx:** oh it's fine! Its good to burn off extra magic energy and it releives stress and niether of us get hurt, like how you spar with meta knight but you're all good with eachother

**Sherlock:** Ohhh i get it!!

**Meta Knight:** I can hear Magolor in that message

**Marx:** he needs some time to chill out for a bit but hes reading over my shoulder here

**Rat Bastard:** Hang on, how the fuck

**Rat Bastard:** Do you type with your claws??

**Marx:** styluses do not taste good, in case you were wondering

**Meta Knight:** Ah.

**Marx:** if i was a lil more patient id have better grammar but typing is a pain in the ass so no thanks

**Rat Bastard:** Oh sweet, stylus gang. Claws + screen = no.

**King Dedede:**...Alright I know we said no pryin and all but (and feel free to say no) dya have anything else to say other than “yes”?

**Rat Bastard:** “Yes” was MORE than enough to cause chaos

**Marx:** Mag and i have been in a qpr for like 3 years

**Susie:** OH.

**Rat Bastard:** Oh wow you're _serious_

**Rat Bastard:** oh wait that sounded super mean that's NOT what I meant

**Marx:** don't worry dude you got a laugh outta mags

**Marx:** oh wait I DONT HAVE A STUPID NICKNAME this must be fixed hang on

**Marx:** alright this one got a certified “NO” from maggie so its the one im using

**Marx has changed their name to “You Can't Handle The Truth!”**

**You Can't Handle The Truth!:** need to think of something shorter tho

**Susie has changed You Can't Handle The Truth!'s name to “Truthteller”**

**Susie:** Irony.

**Truthteller:** perfection.

**Nyagolor: >**set username Truthteller to “Traitor”

**Nyagolor:** Oh what??

**King Dedede:** DEDEDENIED

**Truthteller:** HA

**Susie:** I've temporarily removed your mod status so you can't keep kicking people. I'll re-promote you after the game.

**Nyagolor:** :(

**Susie:** Alright, who's next?

**Stabby McStabface:** I will accept a challenge.

**Sherlock:** ohh okay! Truth or dare!

**Nyagolor:** I'm pretty sure he just chose dare, dude

**Sherlock:** oh right

**Sherlock:** hmmmmm

**Sherlock:**...i dare you to give me a picture of you!

**Truthteller:** OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Stabby McStabface:** No.

**Nyagolor:** That's not how this works!

**Nyagolor:** He dared you, you do the dare!

**ow, the edge:** Whatever happened to honor, hm?

**King Dedede:** YESSSSS

**Meta Knight:** Go on, then!

**Stabby McStabface:** You'd speak of honor? The true disrespect here begins with Kirby, as the original game bears consequences for failure, while this was meant for mere entertainment!

**Truthteller:** alright chill out shakespheare we get it

**Sherlock:** alright alright, i guess that was kinda unfair

**Susie:** Hmm... I think any dare for Stabby would be unfair.

**Susie:** He can't send pictures, so he has no way to confirm whether or not he did the dare.

**Rick:** We've been racing to the castle this whole time, so we couldn't do any dares!

**Nyagolor:** I think the lack of rules or order completely messed us up.

**Marshmallow:** maybe we should play a different game, and set up the rules BEFORE we start?

**Truthteller:** yeah that sounds fair

**Coo:** What'd ya have in mind?

_Marshmallow is typing..._


	12. A More Dangerous Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone finally wins a game.

_10:19 AM_

**Marshmallow:** never have I ever? that doesn't need any pictures

**Truthteller:** sure!

**Stabby McStabface:** Now, elaborate on the rules.

**Marshmallow:** okay okay, so everyone starts with... lets say 10 points. you say if you lost a point by posting how many points you have now

**Marshmallow:** we go in alphabetical order, by nickname since we dont know stabby's name

**Marshmallow:** actually lets start with stabby since it was his turn in truth or dare. sound good?

**Susie:** Finally, a sense of order. All good.

**Stabby McStabface:** Very well then. “Never have I ever”, displayed a portrait of myself.

**Sherlock:** what, like a selfie?

**King Dedede:** You're trying to tell me that you've NEVER EVER shown off a selfie, to ANYONE

**Truthteller:** yea i could believe that

**Meta Knight:** I believe he meant in the chat. Everyone else has shown off pictures, either because they were discovered or to show the undiscovered who they are.

**Susie:** Well, that's one way to effortlessly destroy everyone.

**Stabby McStabface:** Thank you.

**Marshmallow:** actually... can we get a full definition on that?

**Nyagolor:** No, Bandan, that's not how this works.

**Nyagolor:** You're not supposed to imply to them that there's obvious loopholes, that's how they get patched out.

**Stabby McStabface:** If you yourself have sent an image depicting yourself in this chat, you lose.

**Marshmallow:** thanks!

**Marshmallow:** i didn't lose points this round

**Meta Knight:** Hm?

**Marshmallow:** neither did meta knight, King Dedede, kine, or coo.

**Marshmallow:** our pictures were posted by someone else :)

**King Dedede:** HEY YEAH!

**Stabby McStabface:** … Is that really allowed.

**Marshmallow:** you said it was.

**ow, the edge:** How devious!

**Truthteller:** baby's first deception <3

**Nyagolor:** They grow up so fast...

**Marshmallow:** marx i am older than you

**Truthteller:** whatever, 9

**Nyagolor:** 9

**ow, the edge:** 9

**Susie:** 9

**Rick:** 9

**Gooey:** 9

**Excitable Artist:** 9

**Ribbon:** 9

**Sherlock:** 9!

**Flower Child:** 9

**Rat Bastard:** 9

**Susie:** Wow that's annoying to look at. Is that everyone?

**Meta Knight:** I believe so.

**Susie:** My turn~!

**Susie:** Never have I ever... been possessed. :)

**King Dedede:** OH YOU TARGETER

**Nyagolor:** You're not the only one here who's been possessed, but the fact it happens to you enough that you call it targeting is fuckin hilarious. 8.

**King Dedede:** 9

**Meta Knight:** 9.

**Susie:** Oh, um, my apologies...

**Meta Knight:** I was recalling an incident in Patch Land, but I'll gladly take an apology from you.

**Susie:** Oh.

**Excitable Artist:** 8 :(

**ow, the edge:** 8\. Dark Mind.

**Rat Bastard:** 8... :(

**Susie:** Huh, I didn't realize how effective that would be.

**Flower Child:** is it my turn then?

**Truthteller:** nope, by nickname remember?

**Truthteller:** there's... not a lot of things i havent done

**Truthteller:** OH!

**Truthteller:** never have i ever crashed a ship

**Nyagolor:** Targeting. 7

**Meta Knight:** Targeting. 8

**Sherlock:**...targeting? 8

**Susie:** Not targeting. 8

**Rat Bastard:** Definitely not targeting. 7

**Truthteller:** you're all terrible pilots

**Sherlock:** wait daroach when did your ship crash??

**Sherlock:** i dont think i did that....

**Truthteller:** ASDFGHJKKJHGFDDFGH

**Rat Bastard:** When you steal an airship, you don't really have time for airship driving lessons. I'm self taught.

**Truthteller:** WAIT HANG ON IS KIRBY RESPONSIBLE FOR ALMOST EVERY SHIP CRASH

**Sherlock:** i've crashed the warp star before, so thats me

**Meta Knight:** The Halberd crash was Kirby's fault, yes.

**King Dedede:** You mean the FIRST Halberd crash?

**Meta Knight has silenced King Dedede for 1 minute!**

**Susie:** Hm. Now that I think about it, I was not the one to crash the Access Ark. I don't think I was supposed to lose points this round.

**Truthteller:** too late

**Nyagolor:** The first crash was on me, but Kirby and the gang did take her down the second time.

**Truthteller:** what a reputation. to crash 3 ships and a hovercraft.

**Flower Child:** okay so NOW it's my turn

**Truthteller: @Excitable Artist**

**Rat Bastard:** Local spider needs to relearn the alphabet

**Flower Child:** noo!!

**Meta Knight:** You seem pretty eager, Taranza. Have something special in mind?

**King Dedede:** Ooooooooo....

**Marshmallow:** “never have I ever kidnapped anyone”

**Flower Child:** HEYYYY

**Truthteller:** SDFGHJDSDFGHJKL

  
  
**Meta Knight:** That's definitely targeting, Taranza's the only person who'd be affected by that.

**Marshmallow:** i know what im doing for my turn!

**Flower Child:** NOOOOOOOO

**Flower Child:** please dont :,(

**Nyagolor:** You're high on the scoreboard, you can take a hit.

**Flower Child:** THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO STILL HAVE 10 POINTS

**Marshmallow:** sorry ranza, i wont!! i was joking i didnt want to be mean :(

**Flower Child:** oh! okay!!

**Truthteller:** ado, go

**Excitable Artist:** Uhh okay!

**Excitable Artist:** Never have I ever... tried to take over the world?

**King Dedede:** Oof, 8

**Nyagolor:** Define “the world”.

**King Dedede:** TAKE THE LOSS, FUCKER.

**Nyagolor:** 6.

**Susie:** Define “take over”.

**King Dedede:** Susie. Really. That was the most takeovery takeover ever.

**Susie:** Okay but it technically wasn't me, though.

**Sherlock:** hhmmmmmmmmmm im counting that

**Susie:** Alright alright, 7.

**Truthteller:** aaaaaaaand 8...

**Meta Knight:** Hmm, 7...

**Meta Knight:** I believe that's everyone, if you aren't counting Taranza.

**Flower Child:** wh

**Flower Child:** why would i be counted i'm innocent

**King Dedede:** You're an accomplice like Susie!

**Flower Child:** but I didn't do anything!!

**Rat Bastard:** Holy shit those are BOLD WORDS to say to the person you kidnapped

**Susie:** Go ahead, try to prove your innocence, Taranza.

**Flower Child:** FINE

**Flower Child:** NEVER HAVE I EVER FOUGHT KIRBY.

**Susie:** …

**Rat Bastard:**...Oh my fucking god??

**Truthteller:** well, you can tick genocide off your to-do list

**Nyagolor:** Everyone's fucking _dead_ man...

**King Dedede:** uhhh

**King Dedede:** Can... we get a definition on 'fight'?

**Meta Knight:** It wouldn't matter either way Dedede, you've fought him while not possessed.

**Marshmallow:** i still want that definition tho...

**Rat Bastard:** YOU'VE fought Kirby???

**Marshmallow:** it was near the beginning of my training... not a very long fight.

**Rat Bastard:** Oh my god Taranza I think you just got EVERYONE if even Bandan's fought him...

**ow, the edge:** Lords above...

**Susie:** I think... that this may be easier to count... if we count those who _survived_ this attack instead of those who lost...

**Sherlock:** please define fight

**Sherlock:** then please define kirby

**Rat Bastard:** WH

**ow, the edge:** Yes, Shadow Kirby counts.

**Rat Bastard:** OH. MY GOD.

**Rat Bastard:** EVEN KIRBY HAS FOUGHT KIRBY.

**Susie:** If you have not harmed or attempted to harm Kirby or any variations of Kirby, please speak now.

**Rick:** Here

**Gooey:**!!!

**Kine:** I haven't

**Coo:** No animosity here!

**Ribbon:** Nothing here...

**Stabby McStabface:** Present.

**Flower Child:** not me, but I guess that's obvious... sorry everyone??

**Daroach:** WH

**Sherlock:** WHAT??????

**Marshmallow:** HUH

**Meta Knight:** Excuse me?!

  
  
**King Dedede:** WWWWWWHAT THE FUCK?!?!

**Flower Child:** was it something I said????

**Excitable Artist:** HOW

**Truthteller:** HANG ON THIS IS NEWS TO ME

**Flower Child:** WHAT HAPPENED I WASNT PAYING ATTENTION

**Sherlock:** s

**Sherlock:** sta

**Sherlock:** _STABBY HASN'T FOUGHT ME?!_

**ow, the edge:** Coward!

**Nyagolor:** Fuckin' wannabe...

**Sherlock:** OF COURSE I DONT KNOW WHO HE IS IVE NEVER MET HIM!!!

**Sherlock:** WHO ARE YOU **@Stabby McStabface**

**Stabby McStabface:** And why would I ever answer that question?!

**Meta Knight:** Oh. _Oh._

**Sherlock:** OH WAIT

**Sherlock:** UHH

**Sherlock:** KNIGHT WHO HASNT FOUGHT ME

**Sherlock:** YOU FOUGHT META INSTEAD

  
  
**Sherlock:** YOURE GALACTA KNIGHT.

**Susie:** …

**Susie:** Game over. You win.

**Susie has changed Sherlock's name to “Kirby the Clever”**

**Susie:** This has been a turn of events.

**King Dedede:** WE WON!!

**Meta Knight:** Good game, Galacta Knight.

**Stabby McStabface:** NO. THIS CANNOT BE.

**Nyagolor:** That's what they all say.

**Truthteller:** all aboard the friendship train!

**Kirby the Clever:** CHOO CHOO!

**Kirby the Clever:** picture please :3

**Truthteller:** aw damn writers block i cant come up with anything stupider than Stabby McStabface

**Nyagolor:** How about “loser”.

**Truthteller:** tempting but i want something cruel AND funny

**Truthteller:** thats when i peaked man im never gonna be funnier then that

**Stabby McStabface:** I will not be sending you a portrait, I will not be your ally, and I will _not_ be mocked!

**King Dedede:** Weren't you imprisoned for like thousands of years? Do you even know how to take pictures on that thing?

**Truthteller:** DEDEDE YOURE MY HERO

**Truthteller has changed Stabby McStabface's name to “Ye Olde Boomer”**

**Susie:** That's not how generations work.

**Nyagolor:** Hey, you agreed to the challenge in the beginning, you can't just NOT be his friend at this point, dude

**Truthteller:** boomer is a state of mind, Susie

**Truthteller:** also yeah dude not cool go make friends with the puffball everybody loves him

**Ye Olde Boomer has left the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Susie:** Oh.

**Kirby the Clever:** oh no!!

**Nyagolor:** >invite “Galacta Knight”

**Nyagolor:** Oh right

**Susie has promoted Nyagolor to Moderator!**

**Susie has added Galacta Knight to the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Galacta Knight has left the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Susie:**...hm.

**Meta Knight:** Someone should talk to him. He seems upset.

**Susie:** Be my guest, I'm not very good at comforting people.

**Truthteller:** hey uh thats not good

**Susie:** Keen observation skills, Marx.

**Truthteller:** no no no you dont understand

**Truthteller:** he values the guessing game over the other games we play

**Truthteller:** he lost the game because he hadnt fought kirby

**Truthteller:** and hes super violent and has roundabout logic

**Nyagolor:**...Oh. Oh no.

**Meta Knight:**...Should we be worried?

**Kirby the Clever:**...why do i hear boss music?

_Several people are typing..._


	13. The Most Dangerous Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stabby McStabface lives up to the nickname.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Knife Monopoly... or nutball, take your pick. The last chapter... (*ahem* except for the epilogue *cough cough*) it's been quite a ride! I've been thinking about things I could've done differently, things to make it longer or more interesting... I've learned so, so much about the characters since I started - I started writing this before I even learned there were active Kirby tumblrs, iirc!! But, what's done is done, and given the amount of chatfics that have popped up recently... I think I did okay. <3
> 
> Thank you all for reading, and enjoy!

_10:56 AM_

**Truthteller:** THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR MEMES KIRBY IT IS TIME TO RUN

**Susie:** Okay holy shit you're at Dedede's castle right?!

**Meta Knight:** Everyone get to Dedede's castle NOW, it'll take all of us to fight him

**Nyagolor:** Holy shit

**Nyagolor:** Hang on

**Nyagolor:** I need coords

**Nyagolor:** Coordinates, quickly

**Marshmallow:** youre gonna fight with us??

**Nyagolor:** if I can GET THERE IN TIME, yeah

**Truthteller:** I'LL FIGHT TOO

**Kirby the Clever:** :,O you guys..!

**Meta Knight:**...very well then. We need all the help we can get.

**Meta Knight:** Listen to me. **@ow, the edge**

**Meta Knight:** You want a chance to redeem yourself? I've been repairing the mirror at your request. Meet me on the dark side, fight against Galacta Knight with us. Repay your debts.

**King Dedede:** YOU WHAT

**ow, the edge:** You WHAT

**Meta Knight:** You heard me! Get to your side's mirror temple. If you want your freedom, earn it.

**ow, the edge:** I'm on my way

**Rat Bastard:** On my way to the castle rn

**King Dedede:** OKAY OKAY, uhh let's all get into a voice chat so we can get set up faster!!?

**Susie:** All of us panicking in one voice chat would be far too hectic!

**Meta Knight:** Split up then, join a group with the people you need to be talking to, we'll reconvene in one chat when it's time. Go.

\-------

_Star Allies: Voice Channel #1  
  
11:01 AM_

He was flying as fast as his wings would take him.

Meta Knight needed to be quick and on guard – if Galacta Knight chose to pursue him, he didn't want to have to fight him alone, which meant he'd need to do this next part quickly.

He'd need to be quick regardless, but the extra threat and challenge helped keep him more on his toes.

Wind rushed past his face, mostly blocked by his mask, the sound nearly deafening from his sheer velocity.

A similar sound came from his little phone's speaker, where someone not unlike him was traveling at the same breakneck pace.

A glint from below caught his eye. It was what he'd been searching for. He swooped down to pick it up in one smooth motion before changing course.

The mirror shard buzzed with energy.

“I have the last piece, I'm on my way.”

“I'm almost there,” replied a familiar yet unfamiliar voice, uncannily similar to his own.

He could see the mirror's temple.

Again, he wondered to himself if this was a good idea. He had no reason to trust this doppelganger...

He recalled the desperation in his messages. The plea to at least, _at least_ let Kirby live well and free.

His wings flapped with more force as he ascended to the temple.

“I'm here,” he said quickly, the last shard in hand before the incomplete mirror.

The app made an odd, robotic crackling sound, vaguely reminiscent of a voice. The kind of sound that it would make if you spoke over someone.

“What was that?”  
  


“I said I'm here,” replied Dark Meta Knight.

Great minds think alike. Or perhaps birds of a feather would be more appropriate.

The thought of feathers had him quickly placing the final shard into the frame.

The newly created portal sparkled with power as the seams between the pieces vanished, leaving an intact Dimensional Mirror.

Meta Knight blinked as what was once glass became his reflection.

He was a bit concerned. It seemed to be an actual reflection, given the knight in the mirror was blue and bore no extra scars, along with the rest of the temple seeming accurate to the one he was standing in.

He stared with a worried frown at the mirror.

…

...his reflection blinked.

He jumped back with alarm, the illusion of normalcy destroyed by the simplest of actions.

The shade of blue and purple in the mirror was a touch too dark, everything a tad sharper, and the knight in the mirror...

Meta Knight took a moment to collect himself before offering a hand to the dark knight.

...and after a moment, his twisted reflection stepped out of the cursed mirror and took it.

\-------

_Star Allies: Voice Channel #2_

_11:04 AM_

“Just shut up and give me coordinates already!” Magolor shouted at Susie, frantically scrolling through the Lor's database to find the information himself.

“I can't, I need to find a safe height first-”

“Fuck that, I can recover from a bad warp-”

“Oh, _can_ you?!” shouted Dedede over the two of them. The implication was not lost on Magolor.

“When I'm _conscious,_ yes!”

Marx made a noise of complaint from behind him, likely from all the shouting they were doing. He glanced back at him and felt a little pang of sorrow at his distress. He was pacing, wings at the ready and flickering through colors rapidly, visibly upset at his current inability to help or do anything at all.

Due to no fault of his own, it was adding to Magolor's stress as well. The air crackled with magical energy that only he could detect, making his ears twitch at every invisible spark, Marx's sheer power an eye-catching beacon of light to his senses. He had to stay focused on task while Marx unintentionally drew his attention in every way he could.

Magolor flicked his cape, catching Marx's eye. He beckoned him over, pushing the fabric away to leave an open spot at his side.

The anxious noddy trotted over and snuggled into position, Magolor letting his cape settle on his head like a blanket.

He continued his search for the location of-

He stopped and scrolled back up.

A location, visited late October several years ago... labelled _ansia'mapop._

Star of Hope.

“Found it!”

\-------

_Star Allies: Voice Channel #3_

_11:09 AM_

Daroach considered himself an agent of chaos.

Within the thievery and the antics of his squad, there was a lot of high energy, high stakes action, which he'd learned to thrive in, so the hectic situation didn't phase him as much as it could've. The chaotic lifestyle had him finding himself going from collected to off-the-walls crazy at the drop of a hat. He found himself being better friends with Marx than he expected, really.

But at the end of it all, he was a team leader, the coordinator and choreographer, the one who got shit done.

And one more very important role that he wore like a badge of honor.

“Still doin' okay there, Kirby?”

“Poyo...” he mumbled, and then tap-tap-tapped out a message that _ba-dinged_ into Daroach's direct messages.

**Kirby:** yeah, i mean ive been in crazier situations than this! its just a little jarring... kinda all of a sudden yknow??

Daroach looked back up to see Castle Dedede ahead of them. They'd be there shortly.

“Yeah, I get it. Me and the squad are almost there, so you hang tight, huh?”

“Poyo!”

He smiled a little.

_Ba-ding!_ **Kirby:** do you think he'll wanna be friends when all this is over??

The smile vanished.

Marx was a dreamlander. Friendship, love and trust would be values he was raised in, despite everything, and even when banished to the depths of space he still found a friend – more than that, even – to be around. Companionship was a must.

Magolor was polite and friendly in every capacity. He was fun to tease or talk with, clever and quick-witted... on the second day, he talked about how much effort he put in to be kind and improve upon himself. Daroach got the impression that he was still cheeky, a liar and a trickster, but those genuine moments were too valuable to disregard.

Dark Meta Knight seemed tolerant, at least... but he still participated a bit in conversation. He was quiet, yet thoughtful, and despite being a twisted version, still reminded him of Meta Knight. If the mirror world really was identical, then did he not have his own Kirby to care for and protect?

Galacta Knight.

He would get frustrated easily. Didn't take to being teased, but mocked others. Tolerant at best. Prided himself on honor, but the second it inconvenienced him...

Galacta Knight was not a friend.

Daroach re-read Kirby's message.

“...you know what? I sure hope so, bud.”

Kirby giggled happily, and Daroach's smile returned.

He glanced back up to find the crew looking at him, all with smug expressions.

He just rolled his eyes at them.

They were all like his family, and he would happily count Kirby among them.

\-------

_Star Allies: Voice Channel #4_

_11:11 AM_

_Ba-dum! Ba-dum, ba-dum, ba-dum!_

“Is that everyone?” Taranza asked, his voice slightly shaking.

“Yes,” Susie reassured him, “The Lor should be here soon, and then everyone will be here physically, too.”

The two identical knights were flying in from the south, with Daroach and his crew disembarking their ship, which they'd landed in the east. King Dedede held his hammer at the ready, prepared to defend his castle and his friend with equal force. Bandana Waddle Dee stood guard at his side.

Adeleine and Ribbon were more nervous than Taranza, clutching a paintbrush like a spear and with a white-knuckle grip on the shard gun, respectively. Daroach, seeing their hesitation, went to stand by their side, giving them a confident grin. They shakily smiled back at him, with a little more resolve behind their eyes.

Taranza's magic sparked in his closed hands as he anxiously readied his spells. Susie sat beside him, seemingly checking the buttons on her remote, before putting it back in her pocket and retrieving her blaster to fiddle with instead. Taranza watched her as a distraction. Noticing his eyes on her, Susie quietly explained the mechanisms of it.

“Okay, the second I do this it's either gonna kick me from the chat or give you guys some awful feedback, the chat doesn't really like interdimensional travel all that much. So Marx and I are gonna disconnect for a moment so we don't clog up comms.”

“Don't die without us!”

There were a couple disconnection chimes.

“When's he getting here..?” Gooey looked up at Rick to ask.

“Who? Marx and Magolor?”

“Nono, the other friend! Stabby! Galaknight!” Gooey said with a smile.

The trio of animals shared a glance amongst each other.

Coo turned to Gooey in an attempt to break the news gently, “I don't think Galacta Knight is really a friend, bud.”

Gooey tilted his head a bit. “But he was in the friend chat!”

“Not anymore.” Meta Knight chimed in as he landed.

Dark Meta Knight looked around warily at the group, seeming unsure about the situation.

Kirby smiled and waved. “Haii~!”

It was probably just a trick of the light, but he could've sworn he saw a soft smile on the dark knight's face. Daroach beckoned him over, giving him a position to defend.

Meta Knight made his way over to Kirby's group, drawing a spare sword from his cloak and offering it to the young star warrior. Kirby eagerly took it, feeling energy course through them. They felt lighter and more graceful, yet stronger and tougher all the same. They adjusted the green and yellow cap on their head and nodded up at him.

When they looked up, they caught a glimpse of a light in the sky. A wide smile formed on their face, and they pointed and waved, knowing that soon the Lor Starcutter would follow.

They stopped waving.

The clouds parted from a strong force creating a shockwave through them, what seemed to be a shooting star descending from the sky being the source.

The glint Kirby had seen was from the armor of the greatest warrior in the galaxy.

He fell into a glide, great feathery wings spreading out and dispersing the reentry flames from his body. He circled in the air like a hawk scanning for prey.

The Star Allies readied themselves.

Galacta Knight dove for them.

Everyone jumped back away from the impact, a wave of energy rushing over them as the knight glared at the group. He slowly scanned them, taking in the sight of each friend before settling on Kirby.

He drew his lance. Kirby drew his sword. Every friend, each companion and ally of Kirby's leveled their weapons at him.

And then there was a great _charge._

Everyone entered the fray swinging, spears thrown and shots fired, webs slung and swords clashed and claws slashed to the point where Galacta Knight flared out his wings to push them all back and flew straight up to get out of the pile of violent energy, shaken up within the first few seconds.

The two Meta Knights didn't hesitate to follow him up, attempting to overwhelm him with a constant flurry of swords from all sides. They only drew back so King Dedede would have the space needed to give him a good smack with his hammer, sending him hurtling back towards the ground where Bandan waited with his spear at the ready, getting in a good jab with speed and gravity on his side.

He hissed in pain and retaliated by swinging his lance, catching Bandan and tossing him away, before pointing it straight towards the crowd and charging in, causing everyone to frantically part as to not be stabbed. Dedede, who'd just landed, didn't have time to recover and dodge, and so he ended up taking the brunt of the damage.

Taranza quickly flung a web that stuck Galacta briefly to the ground, allowing Dedede to get away and Susie to get several good shots off. The knight quickly broke free and surged towards Taranza, enraged, but was intercepted by an icy blast from Daroach which knocked him to the side, away from the poor spider.

Kirby was just about ready to help when he saw another, brighter flash of light in the sky. A smile crossed his face as it grew into a star-shaped expanse of space, and a beautiful blue ship came flying out of it.

_Ba-bum! Ba-bum!_

“Aaand we're b- _wh-”_

“Hey- _what'd I just say?!_ ”

Kirby couldn't help but let out a little laugh despite everything.

Gooey tried to get in a tongue-whip, but Galacta launched in past it to grab and throw him at the other animal friends, Coo and Kine quickly dodging while Rick caught him like a football. Kirby glanced back up at the Lor, barely even able to process the little flash of bright color he saw there before he jumped into the fray himself.

Galacta Knight had made to pursue the trio and their gooey companion, but Kirby himself dashed in to parry his lance with his own sword, twirling forward and knocking the ancient warrior back.

From up close to those striking pink eyes he could see Gala's stunned shock, followed by utter glee as he gave a laugh and tried for another jab which Kirby deflected. The knight followed it up with a flurry of strikes which the hero had to dodge completely, leaving Gala open to charge at the ones he decided were the most unguarded once more.

Gooey, Rick, Kine, and Coo were the most vulnerable... briefly.

Because before Galacta Knight could get in a hit, he was intercepted by the newest arrival to the battlefield in the form of a barrage of electric arrows.

He was forced to dodge and weave, looking up at the unforeseen attacker.

Marx grinned down at him. “Hey~!”

And then hell rained down upon him and sprung up from below as great thorny vines, and before Galacta had recovered from that little twist he needed to put up with the seemingly-random pattern of teleportation, followed by more arrows, followed by an extremely simple kick to the head that amused the jester greatly.

The hero of dreamland, who'd been forced to strike him down before, was completely and utterly delighted at this turn of events.

He felt almost a little lightheaded from the joy and relief of seeing Marx again.

Oh, of course he knew Marx was alive and well before. Before he'd slipped up and sealed his fate as Kirby's friend, even, Kirby had the hunch that he was talking to the not-so-friendly fool himself. The pictures filled him with glee, and hearing his voice over the mic was delightful, but... Seeing the very person that he felt so guilty for destroying, right in front of him, fighting at his side..?

Marx sent Galacta flying with a beam that put him back at the mercy of Dark and Light Meta Knight, likely to the aeon knight's relief considering how hectic a fight with the cosmic jester could be. In the downtime, Marx checked on the group he'd defended, then turned to Kirby...

He could nearly see the exact same thought process behind Marx's eyes. Him smiling, and laying eyes on Kirby and just seeing it fall into shock... before it slowly changed into a giggle, and-

Kirby leaped towards him, tackling him in a hug.

Marx broke into full on laughter, “Hey-! Hey, Kirby, hey...” he tried to get out through his joy before wrapping his wings around the little hero, reciprocating the surprise hug he'd received. “Yeah. Yeah, I missed you too...”

“Poyo!”

A glint of light caught Kirby's eye, and he quickly shoved Marx aside to block a sudden strike from Galacta Knight.

“Whoa- hey!” Marx got in a quick swipe from the talons of his wings, “you don't just interrupt a tearful reunion, you-!”

Galacta knocked Kirby to the side and made to stab Marx straight-on, driving forward-

He hit a five-pointed shield instead.

Kirby nearly squealed with delight.

“Don't. Touch him.” Magolor practically growled.

Galacta Knight didn't pause in his assault, striking against the shield, breaking it apart piece-by-piece.

To Kirby's surprise, Magolor tossed what remained of the shield at him as a distraction and-!

He gasped at the sight of the Ultra Sword, adorned in the trademark cog pattern, which Magolor had summoned and held high in triumph before swinging it down at the stunned knight.

Before he could recover, King Dedede jumped in and swung his hammer, once again sending him flying towards Bandana Dee, who gave him a jab that sent him in Meta Knight's direction, who drove him back towards Kirby, who was able to get in several _great_ hits as a result.

The four turned to Magolor as Galacta Knight briefly retreated.

The usually confident mage's ears folded back at all the eyes on him. “...hi?”

They looked amongst each other for a moment.

“...y'know. I do really hope we can be friends. You were... no, you _are_ a pretty cool dude after all.”

The three others turned to Bandan at his words. Magolor's ears perked up.

“...I meant what I said. Ya'll are welcome on Popstar. Don't make me regret it.”

Meta Knight nodded at King Dedede.

“You have quite a bit of apologizing to do. But. By no means am I opposed to an alliance.”

Magolor grinned at their words before pausing.

“...Kirby...?” he asked, hopefully.

Kirby stared blankly at the traitorous wizard.

His only warning was a little giggle before he gave him the same treatment as Marx and jumped on him, causing the floating friend to sink in the air and let out a little “woah!”

Magolor was shown no mercy as the other three friends followed suit, and the squished cat had to teleport away from the onslaught of love lest he be crushed any further.

Galacta Knight turned around, only to be met with Dark Meta Knight's blade. He fled to the right only to narrowly dodge a shot from Susie and Taranza. He nearly backed up into a triple-star shot, then dodged a swipe from an artistic rendition of Meta Knight, created by Adeleine, then pitched forward into a swipe from Gooey and a blast from Rick.

Galacta Knight paused.

Susie flipped down her visor and leveled her pistol at him.

Taranza slowly and deliberately weaved a magic web.

Magolor twirled two revolution spheres threateningly overhead.

Daroach tapped the triple star against his hand a few times.

Dark Meta Knight drew his sword and settled into a stance.

Adeleine held out her paintbrush as though it were a sword, and Ribbon pointed her crystal gun.

Gooey smiled brightly.

Marx spread his wings, the light glinting brightly off the gold, and grinned.

Rick brandished his little claws, Kine flared out his fins and Coo fluffed out his feathers.

Meta Knight held Galaxia at the ready, smiling with confidence beneath his mask.

King Dedede smugly smirked and slung his hammer over his shoulder, ready for a good swing.

Bandana Waddle Dee clutched his spear tightly and aimed it straight for his core.

Kirby stood, with friends on all sides, and only stared, waiting for his next move.

…

...and when Galacta Knight did nothing, he held out a hand. An offering.

The knight growled. Injured, weak, and completely surrounded, he had lost.

He took flight without a word, and left for the stars.

…

…

...Kirby fell over onto his back with a great sigh, completely exhausted from the emotional and physical toll of it all.

\-------

_2:33 PM_

**Kirby the Clever:** my nap is over!

**Truthteller:** mine isn't

**Nyagolor:** Welcome back to the land of the living

**ow, the edge:** I have no idea how any of you could sleep after such an event. I haven't felt the rush of a proper battle in ages!

**Meta Knight:** I agree wholeheartedly.

**Truthteller:** you're the same person

**Meta Knight:** Dark, I don't suppose you'd be interested in a sparring match?

**ow, the edge:** Oh, _absolutely_

**King Dedede:** LEMME SPAR TOO I WANNA KEEP BEATING THINGS UP

**Marshmallow:** the battles been over for like 2 hours but im still kinda shaking, can I get a distraction or something?

**Nyagolor:** Ado and Ribbon are checkin out the Lor to calm down. If you want, you can join us, we're just doing little drawings but I have a high quality pillow fort if you wanna sleep it off instead.

**Marshmallow:** all of that sounds good! ill be there

**Kirby the Clever:** you can draw??

**Nyagolor:** Not like professionally, but I can sketch blueprints and stuff so the skill translates over nicely.

**Kirby the Clever:** I wanna come draw!!

**Nyagolor:** Be my guest.

**Nyagolor:** Literally.

**Marshmallow:** hey uhh

**Marshmallow:** what if gala comes back? Could he use this chat to spy on us or something???

**Truthteller:** yo if gala comes back hmu ill kick his ass

**Truthteller:** actually just hit me up for the next galactic crisis, that was fun i wanna do it more often

**Susie:** We already know we can beat him if it comes to that. But if it makes you feel better...

**Susie has banned Galacta Knight from the chat “Star Allies”!**

**Coo:** Oh, good. No more of that!

**Nyagolor:** I share Marx's sentiment, by the way. Let me know if you need help with any serious big-bads!

**King Dedede:** STAR ALLIES FOREVERRRRR

**Rat Bastard:** WOOP WOOOP

**Nyagolor:** YEAH! STAR ALLIES FOREVER!

**Truthteller:** FUCK YEAH GO STAR ALLIES

**Nyagolor:** oh hey wait

**Nyagolor has changed Truthteller's name to “Traitor”**

**Traitor:** fucker

**Kirby the Clever:** I love you guys

**Kirby the Clever:** <3

**Kirby the Clever:** Star Allies Forever!


	14. Take A Guess (Epilogue)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place AFTER Star Allies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a new game for you all to play.
> 
> Or at least, an old game with a fresh coat of paint.
> 
> Guess who everyone in this chapter is. I imagine it won't be too difficult, but then again nobody's played it yet so *shrug*
> 
> Have fun! <3

_One year later_

_3:25 PM_

**Lesbian Alpha 0.0.3 has added Francisca, Flamberge and Zan Partizanne to the chat “Star Allies”!**

**The Whole Circus:** eyyy!

**Applebees:** Glad you could make it!

**Cleanse Thy Flesh:** Welcome.

**Lesbian Alpha 0.0.3:** Welcome aboard and enjoy your stay.

**Flamberge:** Bonjam and jamanke!!

**Zan Partizanne:**...are you certain we're in the right place? I don't recognize any of these names.

**The Whole Circus:** SDFGHJHGFDSDFGHJHGFDFGHJK

**J*lly F*llow:** hiiiiii!!! dont worry youre in the right place!!

**The Whole Circus:** you'll earn your nicknames later ;)

**Zan Partizanne:** No, I think I'm fine with my own name as it is, vun'jamanke.

**Bangin' Out The Tunes:** You don't have a choice

**Flamberge:** Zan might not want one but hell yea count me in!!!

**Flamberge:** How do I change it??

**Hypocritical Therapist:**.> nickname “insert name here”

**Macho Man:** OH THE MAGES ARE HERE!

**Macho Man:** Was wonderin what the hell ya'll were blowin up my phone for.

**Flamberge:** Help I can't think of anything funny

**The Whole Circus:** dont worry thats my job

**The Whole Circus has changed Flamberge's name to “TTFAF”**

**TTFAF:** HELL YEAH NICKNAME

**TTFAF:** I have no idea what this means

**The Whole Circus:** “through the fire and flames”

**The Whole Circus:** tis a song name

**TTFAF:** I LOVE IT

**The Whole Circus:** OO WAIT

**The Whole Circus has changed Francisca's name to “Ice Ice Baby”**

**The Whole Circus:** i see you bein all quiet over there dont be afriad to speak up

**Ice Ice Baby:** Japologa, I was just trying to listen and didn't want to interrupt.

**The Whole Circus has changed Zan Partizanne's nickname to “Thunderstruck”**

**Thunderstruck has changed their nickname to “Zan Partizanne”**

**The Whole Circus has changed Zan Partizanne's nickname to “Thunderstruck”**

**Thunderstruck has changed their nickname to “Zan Partizanne”**

**The Whole Circus has changed Zan Partizanne's nickname to “Thunder Thot”**

**Thunder Thot:** CEASE

**The Whole Circus:** PICK YOUR POISON PARTIZANNE

**Thunder Thot has changed their nickname to “Thunderstruck”**

**Thunderstruck:** I hope you're happy.

**The Whole Circus:** oh, very

**Thunderstruck:** Jambadetana.

**Sharp and Pointy:** oh, im sorry, i dont speak.. that language

**Ice Ice Baby:** Jambandran! It's okay, we're trying to stick to one language, but it's very difficult...

**Hypocritical Therapist:** What does “jambadetana” mean?

**Thunderstruck:** If I knew the translation I'd have used that instead. I was using it sarcastically, but... victory, good for you...?

**J*lly F*llow:** oh!! congratulations??

**Thunderstruck:** I have no idea and looking at that word is giving me a headache, but probably.

**TTFAF:** How do you say that????? con-gra-2-lah-ti-ons??? why

**Hypocritical Therapist:** Con-gra-chu-lay-shi-ons.

**Hypocritical Therapist:**...seeing it spelled out like that feels wrong, but that's how it is.

**Thunderstruck:** I really don't get these nicknames.

**Thunderstruck:** What does a hypocritical therapist entail..? A depressed therapist? One who doesn't follow their own advice..?

**Macho Man:** HA

**The Whole Circus:** FUCKIN CALL OUT POST

**Lesbian Alpha 0.0.3:** Well you didn't just have to destroy him like that but okay... /lh

**Thunderstruck:** How do any of you know who each other are?

**Ice Ice Baby:** On that line of thought, who are you all? Can we get a list of names..?

**The Whole Circus:** hehehehe

**Applebees:** Oh we're not doing this again, are we?

**TTFAF:** juh?

**Macho Man:** GUESSING GAMES PART 2 YALL LETS GO

**Macho Man:** (mods if ya wouldnt mind...)

**Applebees: @everyone**

**God's Favorite Crime:** uh oh

**Rippled Star:** Ohhhh noooo

**Art is Hard:** Again?!

**Goofy Goober:** :D

**Cleanse Thy Flesh:** Oh god, not again...

**Kinda Fishy:** Ohhhh no, not again

**Of The Night:** WE'RE NOT DOING THIS AGAIN

**Flamethrower:** Oh geez no

**TTFAF:** Okay I dunno who flamethrower is but lets be friends immediately

**J*lly F*llow:** i mean it WOULD be nice to play instead of competing!!

**Hypocritical Therapist:** We're not doing this again. No.

**Thunderstruck:** Okay, so, out of morbid curiosity, what exactly is it that we're not doing again?

**The Whole Circus:** STORY TIME STORY TIME

**Lesbian Alpha 0.0.3:** Alright, give me a moment to pull up the chatlog...

**-The End-**

Special thanks and dedication to:

My older brother, Wesley, for giving me the motivation I needed to begin this and laughing at my jokes

The cast of Quotes of Dreamland, some of the best friends I've ever had. Love you kinara <3

Every. Single. Commenter. I'm not great at replying to people, but know that every word you had to say was valuable to me.

My fellow chatfic writers! Whether you started writing because of me, were an inspiration to me, neither, or both, just know I cherish your work :)

Thank you all for giving me the motivation to keep writing. Stay tuned, because there'll be many, many more stories from me for you all to hopefully enjoy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “The target audience is me. I try to make something I would like. That's literally the only consideration.”  
> -Alex Hirsch

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoy any part of this, I HIGHLY recommend the chatfics "King Dedede Makes a Groupchat" and "Marx Attempts to Ruin a Groupchat".  
> This fic wouldn't exist without them, and takes a little inspiration from both, so please give em a little love.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Kirby's Dream Chat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28024740) by [Zum1UDontNo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zum1UDontNo/pseuds/Zum1UDontNo)




End file.
